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I am definitely powerless and my life is definitely unmanageable
By nevergiveup
5/7/2010 3:27:35 AM
Step 1 - Key Principle — Admit that you, of yourself, are powerless to overcome your addictions and that your life has become unmanageable.
I've had a problem with immorality for a long time. Ever since my first boyfriend at BYU...that was 10 years ago. One thing I know is certain, I am powerless. I've tried to fully repent and forsake this sin for good more times than I can count. And although I have had periods of success, the problem always seems to return. I'm an active member of the church, I'm a daily scripture reader, a weekly institute attender, and a morning and evening prayer. But it's not enough. And as I am faced with really really critical decisions in my life right now, in terms of who to marry, a few things have become blatanly obvious...my dating life would have been a lot better had I not been dealing with this problem of immorality, and I cannot receive the kind of personal revelation that I need to make important decisions while I continue to be immoral.

But as I look back at the past 10 years, and all the numorous talks with bishops and the many times that I've tried to forsake this horrible habit, I can only draw one conclusion...I am powerless and my life has become unmanageable.

Comments:

God first    
"Welcome to the site. Good job with Step 1. Now you have people praying for you. Keep working the steps and turn every facet of your life over to God. Do everything with him. And always remember what you have written:

Never give up."
posted at 10:47:27 on May 7, 2010 by BeClean
I hear you    
"It got easier for me when I came to the same realization, I was suddenly not wasting my time trying to do it my way and on my terms. I think unmanagable is too nice a word for my case, more like chaotically useless!
Thanks for sharing"
posted at 15:52:06 on May 7, 2010 by ruggaexpat
How to proceed...?    
"Thanks for your comments and support guys! I think this site might actually help me because it's a way for me to openly admit that I have a problem and it will hopefully hold me more accountable. Are each of the steps just about writing? What else should I be doing, aside from the obvious praying and scripture study, etc.?"
posted at 11:31:56 on May 8, 2010 by nevergiveup
Follow them    
"Good question, what works for me is just doing absolutely everything and I mean everything involved in them and live them from here on in. It is an immense work load for me, given all the other things I have to do in my life but this takes priority for me now. Steps 1 to 3 are a hard preparation for the toughest steps 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, and 9. Step 4 is by far the longest and most searching. Step 5 was by far the hardest because I managed some how to tell my Bishop and wife absolutely everything. It has to be complete to be meaningful. For me telling them I have a problem with lust was not enough, I have to tell them of specifics, like where, when, who, etc. It was hell but well worth the pain. If 4 and 5 are done properly, your heart will start changing and you will be seeking the savior big time.

The action steps are a good guide but this is really a great deal of work."
posted at 13:19:56 on May 8, 2010 by ruggaexpat
Fellowship    
"I second everything RUGGAEXPAT said. For me, it's important to have a support person who has been through this process. Meetings, meetings, meetings! Contact with other recovering addicts helps a lot. And yes, you are right...my program required a lot of writing in the beginning. It's so important to get out all that built up emotional garbage out on paper and out in the open so that we can let it go. Good luck."
posted at 14:33:45 on May 8, 2010 by Anonymous
Congrats on the progress!    
"Unmanageable for you.
Fixable for the Lord.
You are on a wonderful path to recovery. Never give up.
It will be hard at times during this recovery process, but if you keep finding the resolve to improve, you will, with the Lord's help.
Your path is so bright and your future is as bright as your faith.
At times it may be overwhelming, but I recommend just bearing your testimony to yourself, to God, or to others when you feel tempted to slip.
I have found great strength doing this.
I pray that you will have hope, that you will smile, and that you will know of God's love for you.
Trust in Him and all will be well! The Lord IS in control, even when you feel like you aren't."
posted at 16:40:37 on May 9, 2010 by jmoney


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" Is it possible to reclaim a life that through reckless abandon has become so strewn with garbage that it appears that the person is unforgivable? Or what about the one who is making an honest effort but has fallen back into sin so many times that he feels that there is no possible way to break the seemingly endless pattern? Or what about the person who has changed his life but just can't forgive himself?The Atonement of Jesus Christ is available to each of us. His Atonement is infinite. It applies to everyone, even you. It can clean, reclaim, and sanctify even you. That is what infinite means—total, complete, all, forever. "

— Shayne M. Bowen

General Conference October 2006