2 weeks clean now
By hk-47
2/18/2010 10:29:13 AM
Well, today my number counter reads 14. That feels good. More importantly, I feel good. The temptation seems to be less severe after time. Yesterday was tough but today was definitely easier to manage. Prayer, scripture reading, meditation all seem to help.

It also feels like some other issues are easier to manage when the Spirit is present. Today, for example, I found out about some fairly ... despicable behavior by some people I work with. I got over it quickly and I haven't had the urge to strangle them all day. So that's progress. I remind myself that I don't have to like them, but I do need to show them the same love that the Savior would.


Good job!    
"I read a talk somewhere that to conquer sin we need to starve the natural man, not let him influence us to do wrong against the Lord. We need to let the spiritual man take over and allow us to follow the spirit's guidance.
I'm paraphrasing since I don't remember the actual words that were in the talk.
I found it easier to let the Lord help me than to do it my self.
Great job on the 2 weeks!
You can do this!"
posted at 13:22:48 on February 18, 2010 by j89
good point    
"That is a really good point about letting the spiritual man take over. That requires listening to the Holy Spirit. And, it's nearly impossible to listen to the Spirit when I'm in the middle of sin, particularly a sin like pornography.

It's not that the Holy Spirit stops whispering to me, it's that I'm just not able to listen over the spiritual noise that pornography puts out.

Thanks for some good insight."
posted at 08:58:56 on February 19, 2010 by hk-47
I know what you mean    
"I think it is very hard for people to imagine who don't have an addiction. I feel like the closer I get to God and the harder I work at my addiction recovery, Satan is right there working harder and getting louder. And then it is so frustrating because it is like HOW CAN I SHUT HIM UP!!! And that is usually when a person without the addiction will say well that is why you need to have the spirit with you all the time. And yes, that is true, but if you haven't faced it you just don't get that you could read your scripture and have a beautiful spiritual experience and then two minutes later Satan is working so very very hard and pulling you back down. He doesn't stop. I have faith that it is possible but I haven't conquered yet."
posted at 13:19:07 on February 19, 2010 by maybeme
Response to MaybeMe    
"In fact, Satan loves to appear two minutes after the Lord...that's what he did to Moses and to Jesus Christ, himself. Remember that both of them had highly spiritual experiences (I'm reading between the lines when I assume they were both) fasting in the wilderness, talking to God, having visions and revelations. And then Satan appeared and tempted them both to worship him. He gave them everything...and they didn't give in. (For Joseph Smith, the classic example is that Satan came BEFORE God, but I'm sure he had the reverse experience, as well. Either way, Satan likes to get to us at about the same time God does.)

It is highly unusual when I have a deeply spiritual experience WITHOUT feeling the strong temptations of Satan within 24 hours. Either God withdraws to test me, to see if I have learned anything and will still prove faithful, or else Satan simply comes to distract me from what I just felt, or both. In fact, I basically think of deeply spiritual experiences as "triggers." Not that they CAUSE temptation and acting out, but that I have to be on HIGH ALERT for a couple days after attending the temple or even going to church. If I remember that, it seems to help.

I think non-addicts probably face something similar; they are probably tempted to sin in some way shortly after spiritual experiences, and I bet they probably fail just as often as we addicts do. Problem is, they don't really recognize the failure every time. We are fully aware of our sins and struggles, and we abhor ourselves when we fail. Our non-addict friends are not always so aware of their sins, and they are more likely to cut themselves some slack if they do something selfish immediately following a spiritual experience."
posted at 14:49:15 on February 19, 2010 by BeClean
"Did anyone else see on the news how scientists are now saying sex addiction is not addiction at all? I saw a news clip saying that it's not considered the same as addiction to drugs or alcohol but is classified as a personality disorder! Did anyone else see that? Just curious."
posted at 18:05:52 on February 19, 2010 by Anonymous
Sex Addiction    
"Here are Reuters and FoxNews versions of the story you are referring to:,2933,586874,00.html

The part that puzzles me the most about the FoxNews version is the quote, "The idea that people can be addicted to specific behaviors (such as gambling) is also widely accepted.
"But can a person be addicted to sex?"

Is sex not a behavior? Is viewing pornography not a behavior similar to gambling?

The Reuters article seems to think even gambling isn't an addiction. Thanks for pointing this out, Anonymous. What are your thoughts?"
posted at 18:23:25 on February 19, 2010 by BeClean
Good point Beclean!    
""Our non-addict friends are not always so aware of their sins, and they are more likely to cut themselves some slack if they do something selfish immediately following a spiritual experience."...Good point! Sometimes after I feel like things are going really well...and I am feeling some sort of peace in my home...Satan finds a way back into my heart, and the depression gets bad again. I think Satan is working crazy on me to be unforgiving. It's a huge sin I am working hard to overcome. I have made some great progress at times, only to be thrown back onto that stupid roller coaster of ups and downs that I am on. A big down usually follows a big up. I love what you said...I will be more on my guard and try to continue to feel good...instead of letting Satan control my feelings.
My husband actually made this point to me today. I really feel I needed it to be reiterated...thank you for posting this. You helped me more than I can say. "
posted at 20:57:02 on February 19, 2010 by summer

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"The excuse is given that it is hard to avoid, that it is right at our fingertips and there is no escape. Suppose a storm is raging and the winds howl and the snow swirls about you. You find yourself unable to stop it. But you can dress properly and seek shelter, and the storm will have no effect upon you. Likewise, even though the Internet is saturated with material, you do not have to watch it. You can retreat to the shelter of the gospel and its teaching of cleanliness and virtue and purity of life. "

— Gordon B. Hinckley

General Conference, October 2004