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Palpable Temptation
By aug7change
10/27/2009 2:45:34 PM
I'm at 82 days and sitting here with an unbelievable urge to relapse. I can't believe how strong it is. I admit that I've relaxed a bit on my defenses so that probably explains a lot. Anyway, I need to do something productive here so that this will pass. I'm committing to everyone out there that regardless of the day, I will not let it get me today! Tomorrow is another day, but I am going to beat this one. I admit I have allowed myself to view images not exactly pornographic but suggestive, and several times today I've said to myself, what are you doing! And closing out the web-browser. Crazy!

I know several of you have posted many times about this and what to do. I'll reread some of those posts, but I felt it necessary to tell some of you ETTE, GONDOR, SUMMER I commit to you that I won't let it get me today.

Thanks for your good words, and thanks to so many wonderful and good examples I believe I can get through this. Already I feel an amazing feeling, that just by making this commitment to you that the deep and pulsing urges are starting to subside.

Comments:

You can do this!!    
"You are one of the choice Sons here on the earth at the last days...The Lord knows you are strong enough...Times are tough, but you are tougher!! I want you to know I just said a prayer for you. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. We are here for you!!"
posted at 14:59:00 on October 27, 2009 by summer
Desires of the heart    
"Wow! You're doing so well! I hope you'll be able to stay sober, but even if you do give in to the urges, I still think you're making incredible progress.

After giving in last week, I did a lot of soul searching and realized that although I gave in, I had no desire to do so. I simply lacked the strength to withstand. I recently read a great talk by Marvin J. Ashton about the desires of the heart. If you want to, you should be able to find the talk by Googling "The Measure of Our Hearts."

The best part of the talk was when Elder Ashton said, "Ultimately you and I will be judged not only for our actions, but also for the desires of our hearts. This truth was revealed to the Prophet Joseph Smith at a time when he was shown in vision the celestial kingdom" [D&C 137].

I'm amazed when I think that the Savior will give me credit for trying. The hope I gain from realizing that has given me the strength to move past my relapse.

You're doing great, 82 days of freedom has to feel good. Even if you do end up giving in, never lose hope, and please don't give up."
posted at 21:48:37 on October 27, 2009 by ETTE
One more day...    
"Just reporting back, that although I had lots of time to myself and plenty of opportunity, I made it through yesterday... washed the dog, read some books, tried to do some work, cleaned a little. And did some journaling. Today is a new day, a busy day and I hope to stay on track. Thanks for the encouragement!"
posted at 09:32:52 on October 28, 2009 by aug7change
Wow    
"I feel the Spirit so strongly on this site. Knowing that we are all truly humbling ourselves by showing the Lord our weaknesses so that through Him we can make those weaknesses into strengths. I think what we all have to remember is the THROUGH HIM part.....we can't do it on our own. I have a feeling too many of us have tried doing it on our own & that never works. :-) Keep up the good work!"
posted at 22:49:20 on November 5, 2009 by needhelp38


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"Nothing is beyond [Christ’s] redeeming reach or His encircling empathy. Therefore, we should not complain about our own life’s not being a rose garden when we remember who wore the crown of thorns! Having bled at every pore, how red His raiment must have been in Gethsemane, how crimson that cloak! No wonder, when Christ comes in power and glory, that He will come in reminding red attire, signifying not only the winepress of wrath, but also to bring to our remembrance how He suffered for each of us in Gethsemane and on Calvary!"

— Neal A. Maxwell

General Conference May 1987