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Out of control
By chubbygirl
4/23/2008 9:46:32 PM
Step 1 - Key Principle — Admit that you, of yourself, are powerless to overcome your addictions and that your life has become unmanageable.
I admit with all my heart that my life has become unmanageable and that I have become powerless. I can't do with without my Heavenly Father's help. I am so so tired. I hate looking at myself, because when I look at myself I don't see who I really am inside. I only see who I have allowed myself to become. Please help me, please.

Comments:

Sweet Girl    
"I know right where you are. Food is my comfort. Food is my friend, but I sabotage myself with food. I am an emotional eater and have eaten myself into some health problems. However, I am learning how to turn it around. Keep going with the 12 steps. They will help you.
Just do one thing at a time. One breakfast, choose not to eat a high calorie item (bacon, eggs, cheese, juice, bread, syrup, pastry etc). Just take it off your plate. Do not feel wasteful. That is the guilt that followed me is waste. I heard someone say, "It will either go to waste or to your waist". I hadn't thought of it in that way and that little reminder helps me to remember that it is ok not to eat everything.
Remember in surrendering our will to our Heavenly Father's will applies here too. I was told that "an addiction is anything that we habitually turn to instead of God". This has helped me immensely. My low self esteem was hit hard feeling like "well this isn't a real addiction, you're just weak". When I realized that it isn't God's will that I turn to food, it is his will that I turn to Him, that has given me great help.
Choose one thing. Don't try to do it all at once. One day at a time. You can do it!"
posted at 19:50:51 on January 23, 2014 by 1STEPATATIME
thanks for the wise words of wisdom    
"Sweet girl,
Thanks for the plain language about addiction. While I struggle with other issues in primary addictions, the truth you said about the addiction being the obstacle between us and the Savior is so true. I am struggling right now to give up and I am finding that fear is a big obstacle. How can I get along with out the stimulation of the addiction, even though it makes me feel bad; the fear of the unknown of what life might be like when I change.

I think I can understand now why some people don't change, it is easier or safer to stay where you are for the now, even though it is unmanageable its not yet unmanageable enough to force change.

What you said about low self esteem also resinated with me as well. I have thought that I was the only one with real low self esteem, that because of my challenges no one else could possible feel "as bad as I do". Turning inward and wallowing in self pity made me feel worse and even further out of reach of the Savior.

I guess what I am learning is that I have to keep doing the little things one day at a time and that is when things will change slowly as the light does in the dawn. It's just so frustrating to see both where I am where I want to be as well as the conditions of the situation. I realize that my situation should not influence my choices - its just hard which is I guess the way things are supposed to be.

one question for you, or for anyone. Any ideas on how to turn your life over to God. I know reading in the steps it talks about turing your life over to God is a process I just don't know how to make a lasting change. I guess I get caught up in the obstacles in front of me instead of looking at how far the Saviour has brought me so far."
posted at 09:19:03 on January 24, 2014 by sjanderson
It will come    
"Hello SJAnderson!
Thank you for your words! As the wife of an addict and recognizing addictions in my own life I have been in search of the "one answer" to fix everything. So far...no luck. What I have found is working on one thing at a time. The 12 steps are divinely inspired! It isn't 12 steps and done, it is 12 steps and start over. I learned a lot from a talk by Neal A Maxwell in the August 2000 Ensign called "Insights from My Life". One of the most life changing quotes for me has to do with surrendering. It is this, "I am going to preach a hard doctrine to you now. The submission of one's will is really the only uniquely personal thing we have to place on God's altar. It is a hard doctrine, but it is true....when we submit to His will, then we've really given Him the one final thing He asks of us. And the other things are not very, very important. It is the only possession we have that we can give, and there is no lessening of our agency as a result. Instead, what we see is a flowering of our talents and more and more surges of joy. Submission to Him is the only form of submission that is completely safe." So I thought about this and when the Savior says that our sacrifice is a broken heart and a contrite spirit, contrite meaning sincere and complete remorse, I wanted to do just that. So I decided to make a plan to apply it. I would take the time during the week to choose what I would take on Sunday as my "sacrifice", focus on it, pray about it and ponder during the sacrament song then figuratively place it on the altar and really let it go. This was very helpful to me as I ponder the significance of the sacrament and the cleansing that it is. I can't take it back because I have given it to Him. Those have been the most spiritual sacraments that I have participated in.
A talk given by Elder Christofferson in the May 2004 Ensign was also helpful. It is called "When Thou Art Converted". It says, "Is there a good habit or quality that is lacking in your life? When you adopt it and make it part of your character, you are giving a gift to the Lord. Sometimes this is hard to do, but would your gifts of repentance and obedience be worthy gifts if they cost you nothing? Don't be afraid of the effort required. And remember, you don't have to do it alone. Jesus Christ will help you make of yourself a worthy gift. His grace will make you clean, even holy. Eventually, you will become like Him, 'perfect in Christ.'"
Most important know that you are precious! The Lord wants only the best for you!
Change happens. It is real! You asked how to make a lasting change. Every time you choose God's will over your own you are strengthening that new neural pathway that you've created in your brain. Every time you repeat you make it stronger. Every time you reject the addiction you are weakening that neural pathway and it can be overcome and removed by you. It truly is one step at a time. You can do it!"
posted at 05:02:53 on January 27, 2014 by 1stepatatime


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