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BEHIND THE WALL
By chosen
2/10/2008 8:30:42 PM
Yes I was in carcerated. My Story...My Testimony............GLORIFYs AND MAGNIFYs our Lord in a POWERFUL way! I hope to write a book soon....called "UNLOVEABLE" So many blessings, beyound comprehenison. In 2007 I was awaiting sentencing when my elderly father (whom is at the end of life) was taken from my older sister who could no longer care for him properly, I sent the Judge a letter of modification, hopeing he would take into consideration of my father (whom is a worthy priesthood holder) that I had always promised him I would never let anyone put him away like that. That he would never be alone, nor would be alone when the Lord came for him..This was my promise to him! AndI would keep it to the very end! The Judge denied me my request. That nite as I was awaiting my next court date, I prayed like I've never prayed before. Asking the Lord to do the impossible and let me out of jail to take my Dad home.The next day I wrote a personal letter to the Captian of the county jail I was in. I poured my heart out to him.....promises to my father....a GREAT MAN! and the love...the bond we shared........SEALED TO MY PARENTS...........
Never met the Captian before...............Never even seen him...Three days later........He came to the WOMANS DORM called me out expressed his compassion for my DAD. Gave me a special release that same day. I was to go get my dad....take him home....find the proper care for him.....for ever how long it took...and then turn myself back in to be sentenced to Prison. The Deputies were all in SHOCK......Never before have they seen that happen. Yes I can testify to our LORD and his LOVE and GREATNESS. That is just one of his many blessings! He LOVED me the MOST when I was UNLOVEABLE!!!!!!!

Comments:

I have been there, too    
"Probably only those who have spent time inside jail or prison, or who have supported loved ones through that experience, have any idea of the miracles the Lord works there. I spent only a short time there, but it has changed my life for the better. I, too, know of the Lord's love and His greatness!

I read your blog "I Cried a Tear" and was touched. You seem to be far more giving than I have ever been. But I know one thing. The only way I have learned to accept myself is through the Lord's love for me, which He showed me ESPECIALLY during my time in jail, and continues to show me. Building my self-esteem on my job or on my wife's opinion of me (or Church callings or anything else) was worthless. Only when I really learned that Christ loves me and that His Atonement was for ME, in spite of everything I did and everything I failed to do, then I was able to stop beating myself up for all of my failures. I still have that temptation sometimes, but I have found far more peace in the last two years than I ever did before. I am still full of weaknesses, but I know that Christ has not given up on me and will NEVER give up on me, as long as I do not deny the Holy Ghost. I am grateful to Him, love Him, and want to spend my life in serving Him in spite of my weaknesses."
posted at 23:12:22 on February 27, 2008 by J R
YOU HAVE TRAVELED MY ROAD    
"May the Lord Bless you and your family. And remember you were chosen long before you were born. Never give up! He died for you my Brother and don't ever feel you are worthless! You are Gods child!"
posted at 20:11:05 on March 3, 2008 by chosen
Did you Notice?    
"I have often wandered.........If I'am the only one who has ever felt this way? But while I was going through the court system and in Prison.......I felt the depth of Pain and Guilt that I don't feel other people in jail feel. I believe that because we are LDS we know right from wrong...and we know the Saviors Love. I truly know the meaning of SET APART. I felt it in jail. Did you feel that way?"
posted at 21:19:18 on March 3, 2008 by chosen
That feeling that you are feeling...    
"might be "pride"
Don't feel too bad. I have it, too! Sometimes I think that what the world really needs is a presidential candidate like ME. At other times of spiritual insight I will wonder, "Why haven't I been called to be a General Authority yet?" I think that the faster we learn that we have more IN COMMON with everyone else-the sooner we learn TRUE humility. I enjoy your blogs, Chosen. You remind me of my own experience with incarceration. That is where I was "converted". Life on the outside turned out to be the real challenge. I have climbed to spiritual highs and endured very dark lows since then. I've always remembered back to when I was so new in my testimony and how wonderful it felt. Thanks for reminding me of that."
posted at 22:01:52 on March 3, 2008 by Anonymous
PRIDE    
"I WOULD VOTE FOR YOU!!!!!!!!!"
posted at 11:50:42 on March 4, 2008 by CHOSEN
Thank-you! My name is Hillary Clinton. Remember me in November!    
"Just kidding!"
posted at 10:15:12 on March 8, 2008 by Anonymous
Re: "Did You Notice?"    
"In the short time I was in jail, I did notice a difference between some LDS and non-LDS inmates. I also saw a couple of non-LDS inmates who seemed to be on a higher spiritual plane than average. One was studying the Book of Mormon. Another was sensitive to the needs of others and assisted them where possible. I was not aware of anyone experiencing the depth of pain and guilt, forgiveness of others, or of protection and hope that I felt there. But I didn't share a lot of those feelings until after I was outside.

As far as being "set apart", I saw abundant evidence of the Lord protecting me from harm. And I felt the need to do everything in my power to be worthy of His protection and deliverance, which also set me apart from the conversations, attitudes, and actions of many of the other inmates, and connected me to others who sought to progress in their time there.

Personally, I have come to view the jails and prisons as refineries where the Lord purifies the hearts of any who will submit to His influence. (See Malachi 3:2-3.) I do think that those who have felt more of our Savior's light and love, would probably have more intense feelings while incarcerated."
posted at 22:28:07 on March 17, 2008 by J R
Jail    
"I am sorry to bump this old thread, but it seems to apply to me. I have been clean for a few years, but old things are coming back to haunt me. I may have to go to jail for past deeds and I am terrified. I have a very close relationship with my Heavenly Father and the Savior. I do not want to lose my income, to make my wife work and support my children. I do want to do all that is necessary to fully repent, even if it means prison. But I don't want to go. I don't want to get raped on a daily or weekly basis. I have heard Utah prisons and jails are the worst for that, especially for my offenses. I don't want my name in the papers. I know that these are consequences for what I have done, but I plead for mercy from my Heavenly Father. If I would have kept quiet, I never would have been forgiven, and yet my family never would have had to suffer like they will if the cops come and get me.

When I was excommunicated, my bish & stake pres had me open up completely and make confessions to those I had hurt, and now they advise me to get an attorney, and the attorney says don't say anything to the police if/when they come. Am I still following my church leaders' advice if I don't say anything to the cops? "Please call my lawyer about this." It seems the right thing to do is confess to the authorities, and yet it isn't required of me by the church leaders."
posted at 13:48:22 on October 12, 2010 by Anonymous
Follow the advice of your lawyer.    
"I am no lawyer but I know the leaders are in no position to give you legal advise. Theirs is spiritual but legal is another animal. The church will not get involved in legal cousel.
Look you have been honest to get to this point. You must follow your lawyers advice. Counsel with him and confide the truth to him. The others are there as part of the process.

About confession: There is a time and place for it.
Your life hangs in the balance so too does that of your family.
Now it is time to follow the promptings of the spirit.

You have done what is right now follow the lawyers advice, he/she is there to shield you.
Be smart, don't let anyone or anything play with your mind. No one can question your honesty if you have wound up in such a position. Takes honesty to get you where you are.

That is what I would do in your situation but it would be great to have a lawyer add to this thread."
posted at 14:31:45 on October 12, 2010 by Anonymous


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"Brothers and sisters, let's sell that summer cottage in Babylon. Let us be not "almost" but "altogether" Latter-day Saints. "

— Larry W. Gibbons

General Conference October 2006