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Lost
By I.am.neese
9/30/2014 9:50:44 AM
I don't know what to do. I've become addicted to pornography. It scares me because I feel that this will definitely affect my future relationships I've struggled with pornography for a couple of years. I've spoken to my Branch President about it. Aaaaaaaarerrreggghhh.. I know that this is not true but at times I feel so alone with this issue :(

Comments:

you are not alone    
"IAMNEESE,
you are not alone. I imagine it can feel pretty overwhelming in what you describe, I can't imagine what it is you are experiencing. I can tell you though that there are probably other people who are struggling with similiar things that you are struglin with, maybe not the same name or type right now, but deep inside I think we are all hurt or wanting to fill a whole in our hearts when we act out as addicts, that has been my experience. as I speak with other people htough it helps me understand that yes my challenges are different from other people, I am uniuqe in my efforts to try and be better, but I am not so unique that someone can't relate or at least have an idea of what I am feeling. for years I held my feelings inside not wanting to be embarrased or afraid of people finding out who I really was.

I grew up in a pretty small conservative town where I didn't dare step out of line, in fact though I don't think I really wanted to, or I wasn't rebellious per say it was the hurt I had in my heart from not being able to understand life and the challenges that were in front of me. Instead of holding on to the Iron rod like I should have I figured #T$$ it all go do what I want to do since God isn't answering my prayers. even now with a few days of sobriety I am still bitter or angry at a few people feeling like I have missed out on life because of my physical disablity etc, and that maybe I shouldn't give up my addiction.

I hope this helps, please know that you are not alone, most importantly that the savior has experienced what you are feeling now, that people will disappoint you, but the Savior will not."
posted at 16:05:43 on September 30, 2014 by sjanderson
SJANDERSON    
"Thank you so much for the reply! I honestly wasn't expecting any replies. So I really do appreciateit. I think that sometimes I got so caught up in my own guilt that I forget that other people have the similar or even the same struggles. Having been to the Branch President many times because I lapse back to old habits is a litrle discouraging and makes me winder how many mire times I can disppoint Heavenly Father. Being from a branch we don't have the addiction recovery program available. I mean I would love to be able to talk to someone face to face about it. I know that with the knowledge that I'm a daughter of God, that I can overcome this struggle. It just feels like a long shot at the moment."
posted at 17:17:56 on September 30, 2014 by I.am.neese
Welcome    
"Welcome to this site.

I am a mom and a wife of a pornography addict. We've walked this road for a long, long time. Let me assure you that you are not alone. In fact, I would say you are statistically in the majority. Maybe the only unusual thing is you are reaching out for help. A lot of people just hide the problems, but let me assure you that just makes things worse.

Pornography addiction is a tough road to walk but the blessing of addiction is that they teach us to rely on our Savior with such total dependance. God knew the journey you would walk and he is there for you right now.

May I recommend the book, "He Restoreth My Soul" to you as well as really digging in deep to the recovery manual for the 12 steps. These are tools that have deeply helped my husband.

As far as relationships go....yes, this will impact them. But whether they are impacted for good or for bad has yet to be seen. My husband's addiction cause so much destruction in both our lives, but as we started to heal, it became a gift that we were able to increase our humility and love for each other for our Savior because of it. Strangely, it was exactly what we needed to teach us what was really important.

Again, welcome and I hope we can help you on your journey into recovery."
posted at 08:10:04 on October 1, 2014 by maddy
a meeting you might be able to try    
posted at 12:47:01 on October 3, 2014 by canyon1887
You are Definitely Not Alone    
"I struggled with pornography for some time. It was most certainly a difficult time in my life. Don't feel alone. I know of many, many men and women who have struggled with this addiction. With the Savior's help, you can make it.

Yes, I can have negative affects on relationships, but I promise you that if you keep trying, that you will have fulfilling relationships both with your gender and the opposite gender. When I was younger, I really worried about how my pornography addiction might affect my relationship with girls. Because of Christ's Atonement, I was able to break free of that addiction. I now take a lot of joy out of my friendships and relationships with others. In a way, the whole experience, strengthened my testimony of the importance of the joy of human connection and friendship. You will be able to have great relationships. Just keep on doing the right things. Work with your bishop and work with Christ. You can do it."
posted at 02:42:23 on October 6, 2014 by intothewest


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"The excuse is given that it is hard to avoid, that it is right at our fingertips and there is no escape. Suppose a storm is raging and the winds howl and the snow swirls about you. You find yourself unable to stop it. But you can dress properly and seek shelter, and the storm will have no effect upon you. Likewise, even though the Internet is saturated with material, you do not have to watch it. You can retreat to the shelter of the gospel and its teaching of cleanliness and virtue and purity of life. "

— Gordon B. Hinckley

General Conference, October 2004