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Meeting Need for Affection
By Shootingstar
6/23/2014 3:13:46 AM
I've been back into the 12 step groups a lot the last few months. I've been working on step 4. I've started to realize that one of the biggest reasons for my acting out is that I live a life that is totally devoid of affection. To be more specific, affection from someone I care about who cares about me - in a non-sexual physical way. A "bro hug" does absolutely nothing for me. A hug from a girl I like is amazing. How am I supposed to meet this kind of need by myself while recovering if I'm going to do the whole "no dating" thing? And before anyone says it - I don't get see this need being fulfilled any time soon via prayer or church, etc...

Comments:

I wish I could help you    
"Shootingstar,
I am sad to hear about your hurt. I wish that I coudl do something to help you feel better. i am married and am maybe experiencing some similar feelings devoid of affection with my wife. I am hoping that things will heal with the Savior, but there seems to be some pretty raw feelings between the two of us. Something that helps me hope for the future are the 12 promises from AA. I am still hoping for healing, hope these help
We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness.
We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it.
We will comprehend the word serenity.
We will know peace.
No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others.
That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear.
We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows.
Self-seeking will slip away.
Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change.
Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us.
We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us.
We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.
Are these extravagant promises? We think not. They are being fulfilled among us - sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. They will always materialize if we work for them."
posted at 21:05:59 on June 23, 2014 by sjanderson


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"Nothing is beyond [Christ’s] redeeming reach or His encircling empathy. Therefore, we should not complain about our own life’s not being a rose garden when we remember who wore the crown of thorns! Having bled at every pore, how red His raiment must have been in Gethsemane, how crimson that cloak! No wonder, when Christ comes in power and glory, that He will come in reminding red attire, signifying not only the winepress of wrath, but also to bring to our remembrance how He suffered for each of us in Gethsemane and on Calvary!"

— Neal A. Maxwell

General Conference May 1987