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Masturbation Help
By Helpme007
6/9/2013 4:14:28 PM
Hey guys. I'm a seventeen year old guy who's grown up in the church
His whole life. I've always been considered as the male equivalent of a "Molly Mormon"
And for the most part I've lived up to it. When I was ten years old I was having
Trouble sleeping, as it was an extremely hot night. That night I decided to go to bed
Naked, and since then I've been an avid masturbator ranging from 3-4 times a week
To once a day. When I was thirteen I got involved with pornography and was an
Avid participant. I had always thought about quitting but never had the guts
To do it until a series of seminary lessons about visiting with bishops. At that point
At took it as no coincidence and mustered up the courage to visit with my bishop.
I was petrified and shaking that day when I told him all about my pornography problem.
I was surprised as he calmly explained to me the dangers of such activities and quietly
Counciled with me. By the end of the discussion he told me that I was a great kid, and as long as I kept doing what I was doing, I would be just fine. I had a few slip-ups with erotic literature after that, but after further counseling I had finally rid myself of pornography for good. I still continued to masturbate however and never truly considered it to be A problem. After all, I had never heard the term used in the church before, and nobody had ever taught me anything about it. I knew that in today's society it's considered to be a very normal and even healthy activity, so I never thought much about it. One day I was called in for an interview with one of my stake president's assistants. After a quick nervous fit I was told that I was being called to serve on my school's seminary council. He talked to me about worthiness and asked If I was steadily dating. I laughed and told him that it's a rare occasion for me to even hug girls other than my family. He laughed a bit and I went home. Once I was home I couldn't stop thinking about his warnings about worthiness. My ward had recently had a change in the bishopric and I decided it would be best for me to at least let the new bishop know about my past problems with pornography. I called him that night and let him know. Out of a sudden Prompting I also told him that I was involved with masturbation. I was surprised to hear him say that he wanted to speak with our stake president and then call me back. After I got the call I was further shocked to hear him say that since the seminary council didn't do anything during the summer,( I had just gotten out of school for the summer) that I could use that time to repent or else I wouldn't be able to serve. I visited with him personally days later, and after talking through it he told me not to take any sacrament that week or participate in any priesthood ordinances. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. My previous bishop had taken a serious pornography problem and calmly Counciled me through it, while this bishop reacted much differently to a masturbation problem. After that I remained abstinent due to the horror of having to return to him and tell him I had slipped up. About three weeks later I had A particularly awful day and used masturbation as a way to reduce my stress level. It hat was around three days ago. I haven't spoken to my bishop about it yet. All I can say is that I am extremely frustrated with how hard this is for me. Ever since I was ten I've had a very high sex drive and It just won't go away. I've prayed and read my scriptures More than usual, ( I finished the BOM in less than 3 weeks), but nothing seems to be helping! This is worse than my pornography problem was and I just don't know what to do about it. It was bad enough to realize what I've been doing for seven years was a very serious sin, and realize that my mission is only a year away. I also am a little frustrated with the church for not addressing this issue up front. I have read countless articles and heard many talks given by general authorities, and not once have I ever heard the term "masturbation" used once. If it really is such an issue, then why doesn't the church let the youth know? In short I'm very frustrated with myself and I really need help with this one. Anything is very much appreciated!

Comments:

Yes, this is a problem    
"and there is help out there for you, but I'm afraid from what you said that neither one of your bishops have given you the tools you need to get into recovery. Don't blame them though - in all likelihood, they're doing the best they can with what they know, but they are not trained to treat this.

So, what should you do now? First, if you have not already done so, tell your parents. I know you probably don't want to do this, but they need to know. Not so they can get you in trouble, but so they can help you recover. They may be able to get you to see a counselor who specializes in sexual addiction. This can be done in person, or as in my case, I meet with my counselor via web conferencing because I do not live in an area where lds counselors are available, let alone one who specializes in sex addiction.

It's great that you're reading your scriptures. But realize that it is unlikely that reading scriptures and praying will lead to recovery. You need a lot more than that. I would recommend to you that you read EVERYTHING on this website:

rowboatandmarbles.org.

It explains sexual addiction very well from the perspective of a sex addict. Have your parents read it too. It changed the way I thought about my problem, and opened my eyes to how much help I really needed. I realized I could fight this alone. There is no shame in realizing you need help. Sharing your story here is evidence that you realize you need help. Also realize that just because you stop masturbating or viewing pornography for a period of time does not mean that you've got this thing licked. It will come back to bite you when you're weak if you have not gotten yourself into full recovery.

Regarding the word masturbation not being used in church, that's true, it's not something you hear from the pulpit much, is it? I remember being interviewed by a bishop when I was around age 15 or so, and he asked me if I had any trouble with masturbation. I had no idea what that word meant, and was too timid to admit that I didn't know what it was. I figured if I didn't know what it was, I must not be doing it. In my case, I was not at that age, but it just goes to show you we don't do a very good job of explaining these things to our youth. I image a lot of youth leaders and bishops breathe a sigh of relief when they get past the topic of masturbation and there are no questions. No one really wants to talk about this.

Hang in there, and seek the help you need. You can overcome this, and go on to great things. I wish you the best!"
posted at 17:04:37 on June 9, 2013 by notsostrong
Breathe    
"First things first: breathe. Take a few deep breaths and relax. Things will be ok. You have a good heart and if you stay diligent and faithful, you can learn to tame the beast. Part of life is learning to control our physical urges. Some people have a much harder time doing it than others, like us. That is our cross to carry in this world (or at least one of them), and it will take a while but it can be done.

A few thoughts I had while reading:

Tons and tons of guys struggle with masturbation. It's just a fact of life. We all started at different times for different reasons, but it's a common thing. A lot of guys think once they're married the problem (and the problem with pornography) will go away because they can have sex with their wife and that will be it. False. For most the problem goes away for a period of time but comes back before long. Usually around the time kids come around. I guess my point in telling you this is that you're in a good place to realize it's a problem and to be willing to do something about it early before it becomes a problem later when it has a more direct effect on people around you.

Another thought is try not to turn to anger - at yourself, the church, the new bishop, etc. Some bishops are more harsh than others. That's kind of the way it goes. There are pluses and minuses to both methods. You have a stricter one, so you get to decide if you focus on the pluses of that or the minuses of that. Try to let go of anger and focus on what decisions you can make now that can make a difference. What is in your control? What is not?

Another thought is what to do moving forward: I was unable to make progress with my addiction until I bit the pride bullet and attended a 12- step recovery group that the church has basically everywhere. You might seem people you know - that's a good thing. Sexual addiction releases neurotransmitters in your brain the same way that drugs do - and talking with other addicts openly about it and learning from each other really helps. Sometimes praying and reading scriptures just doesn't quite do it. That was the case for me as well.

Lastly, NEVER hide anything because you want to avoid consequences. You might not get on seminary council now, you might be able to still do it. Who knows. Either way, when you slip, you must come out with it soon, otherwise you teach yourself that you can mess up and get away with it. The consequences of not coming out is things are always 100x worse than being straight up at the beginning, even if they are slightly delayed.

Anyway, sometimes I have a lot of thoughts so I apologize for the length. If you want to talk more about it feel free to shoot me an email. recovery.gdodaat@gmail.com

Good luck!"
posted at 17:20:57 on June 9, 2013 by recovery.gdo
Coming from Another teen    
"This issue always irks me. You're obviously a great guy. Follow the "Mormon rules" and want to go on a mission. You overcame pornography which is an amazing accomplishment, one that a lot of us haven't here on this website.

One thing you can't let get out of hand is guilt. Guilt is a thousand times more dangerous than masturbation. You feeling bad about masturbating and the time you spend thinking about it will do you a lot more harm than the actual sin of masturbation.

which brings me to my next point. There are so many ways to sin it helps to understand the weight of them. I believe masturbation is at the lower end with: listening to rap, cussing (sometimes), white lies, etc. Why does that matter? Because the bishop doesn't say come to me everytime you listen to Lil Wayne. Yes it would be better not to, but being a Mormon teenager is extremely difficult and we do some things because we're young.

We as teenagers have raging hormones. Of course masturbation is going to come into play. It's NOT evil like some suggest. It can be but we as Mormons generally don't have really dirty minds, especially if we're active youth.

my point? Masturbation would be something nice to never do but its a part of teenagers life. Treat it like those lower sins. Try not to do it, slip up, ask for forgiveness and MOVE ON. Try to do what you should and stop thinking about it. It's a distraction that's the biggest evil that's come from masturbtion. The guilt.

Trust me, you're doing fine. You're unlikely to "cure" yourself from it until your married. Than you can masturbate your wife and the majority of your hormones will be taken care of. But until then, do what you need. The stake pres or bishop are being too harsh. There is no official statements on masturbation and reaction to it by bishops vary across the board.

Mint"
posted at 18:33:31 on June 9, 2013 by mint
Masturbation is all over the map    
"I can relate to your confusion. There is a lot of shame and different opinions on the subject. Sounds like your different bishops have different views on the subject. Im sorry he was so harsh on you. I somewhat agree with Mint on this.. I would choose slightly different terms.

Guilt is a feeling when "we make wrong choices" that helps us make positive changes in our life.

Shame is a feeling that "we are bad" see the difference? Humans tend to hide or lie when facing shame.

Never let shame own you. It sounds like you are really on the right track. Going to your bishop and working on porn, even with a few slips but purging it is a huge accomplishment. That sounds to me like you are feeling guilt and not shame.

However, I don't think it's a good practice and something that needs to be worked on-- mainly because it keeps your head thinking about sex when your hormones are screaming sex anyways. Gasoline on the fire.

The easiest way to rid yourself of these choices is to tell a real person like your bishop, father, trusted advisor when you have a slip. Don't shoot yourself over the slip.. Feel the guilt. feel sorry. Figure out what triggered it and work on it.

You will do great. Have a great summer"
posted at 19:02:10 on June 9, 2013 by Anonymous
Empahizing    
"I totally understand where you are at because I was there as a teenager. I just couldn't stop with prn/mb all the way into my twenties (except on my mission). I think it has a lot to do with the hormonal changes but then again there are men my age that can't stop either.

I think it is great that you are seeking church counsel but you probably need to look at other resources as well that deal with your life physically, mentally, emotionally, as well as spiritually. Look up a few Tony Lister videos on YouTube. He is a great resource. It has helped me and I am four months clean. But most importantly, I have learned to manage my impulses so they don't get out of control. Frankly, I don't feel the urge as strong anymore. Frankly, 99% of the time I found my past behavior abhorrent. You are a son of God and there is a path laid out for you. Have faith and keep pressing forward."
posted at 14:15:16 on June 10, 2013 by stayingclean
President Kimball gave counsel on masturbation    
"What I can remember from President Kimball's counsel to the youth of the church was that he strongly advised against masturbation as it could easily become a gateway to other sexual sins like homosexual thoughts and possible homosexual actions.

Sexual sin is one of the most severe sins one can commit. I do understand that masturbation is not as bad as other sexual sins but it still comes under the banner of sexual sin and that is serious.

The world and so called psychiatrists and their worldly philosophies will tell you to take psychotropic drugs by the truck load and that masturbation is fine and even encourage couples to delve into pornography to enhance their sexual relationships. This is SATAN'S plan not GOD'S and I am astonished that many church members have been so deceived by Satan's plan. Satan wants nothing but to have his cronies possess you, drag you down to hell and make you miserable.

I truly commend you for overcoming pornography because I feel that pornography is a more devastating problem but you really need to see any sexual sin as a serious matter. I don't mean feel so bad that you become frustrated or angry and then you get the release through masturbation and continue the cycle.

However I would encourage you to consider the influence of unclean spirits in this matter. If you have an over whelming desire / compulsion to masturbate, in my experience over whelming compulsions come from unclean spirit possession.

If this is the problem you have invited an unclean spirit to house in you due to your masturbation. This is why Heavenly Father / and some church leaders treat this as a very serious sin because masturbation is Satan's gateway to more serious sexual sins. However if you can find a truly discerning bishop / priesthood leader they will see the unclean spirit component involved in your addiction and be able to cast it out of you. That is if you have enough faith and truly want to change.

You will still be left with your conditioning and bad habits that you will have to overcome but the overwhelming compulsion that belongs to the unclean spirit will be gone, so you can have a chance to deal with what your problems are and soon you should become repelled by any form of sexual sin.

Good Luck and God Bless!"
posted at 07:37:02 on June 11, 2013 by Anonymous
Gateway Sin    
"I don't understand what you are saying or what Pres. Kimball is saying. Why say it will lead to homosexuality? It could lead to a whole bunch of things. I think it is established that HELPME needs help and that he wants to stop without bring homosexuality into it."
posted at 10:30:29 on June 11, 2013 by Anonymous
Anon    
"For some reason you missed the whole message and just focused on the homosexuality?

I think what President Kimball was trying to say is that masturbation could lead to other sexual sins but skipped most of them and got to, as I can recall what he called it, the heinous sin of homosexuality which means unfortunately for some people WICKED.

What I am trying to explain is that HELPME may get the help he needs with his masturbation and recover and go on to be a General Authority. However someone else may continue masturbating play the problem down think that it is not a very significant sin and then go on with their sin to lose their Celestial inheritance, lose their family, fornicate, rape, delve into homosexuality, molester children or even murder.

If you look at the statistics most child molesters and rapists started by being addicted to porn and used porn just before committing these heinous acts. Take Ted Bundy he was a heinous sexual offender and violent horrific murderer and his parents were or are LDS? If you listen to his interview he will tell you that he got possessed by something and his problem started at first, just by looking at porn.

However he then explains that the compulsions for porn and more of it got out of control and he could not stop. This compulsion then lead to an unquenchable appetite for sexual sin and murder.

I am not for one second saying this is going to happen to any of you and you may all end up spiritual giants. However unfortunately if you play with fire you will get burnt. Lets hope it is only a few blisters on your hands and not a flaming inferno that consumes you.

Good Luck and God Bless!"
posted at 19:41:02 on June 11, 2013 by Anonymous
Homosexuality    
"The official stance of the church is that there are people who identify as homosexual, and it does not necessarily mean they are committing sin or they are heinous or sinful especially since they didn't ask for these feelings and wish they would go away.

Also, if you talk to most of these homosexuals in the Church, most if not all identified these feelings long BEFORE they discovered masturbation. So to say that masturbation leads one to become a homosexual is a falsehood."
posted at 20:23:55 on June 11, 2013 by Anonymous
Anon    
"President Kimball said that masturbation COULD and in some cases does lead to more heinous sins and stats have proven that also?

The SIN is HEINOUS! So why dabble in a lesser sexual sin that CAN lead to a HEINOUS sexual sin?

Where do you think these thoughts of masturbation, pornography and homosexuality are coming from?

As far as I know in the pre-existence we were innocent. Without sin or thought of sin?

So masturbation, pornography and homosexuality thoughts and acts come from WHO?

SATAN!

We won the fight in the pre-existence and unfortunately we are losing the fight here because not many people understand or want to understand the strategic workings of their enemy?

I think I know who Anon maybe. I think I remember reading (if it is you) that you don't think about perversion when you masturbate and if that is true that is very rare. That is why I think that you may get frustrated or angry I am not sure why you need this release but either way you are being influenced by an unclean spirit. If you do have one in you, you would know by the compulsion you experience in regards to masturbation?

I also think that you are a really Good young man and Satan is hammering you the only way he can because you are innately descent and may not be viewing women as objects like most men do when looking at porn and masturbating.

I am not here to judge just want to teach people what I know about our common enemy and the deception and manipulation that he uses."
posted at 21:46:25 on June 11, 2013 by Anonymous
Kick it...    
"Do you live on a ranch in the desert completely "off the grid"? You strike me as one of those neo-conservative nazi-types that don't believe in modern medicine, psychiatrists, science. I'm just ribbin' ya! I have to admit you are growing on me.

You have an antiquated understanding of homosexuality. It is widely understood (these days) that homosexual urges are often innate and not brought on by "sin" or abuse.

What Pres. Kimball said is true. Yes, it CAN lead a person already struggling with SSA to give up fighting and pursue an openly gay lifestyle. It can also lead to child abuse or sexual deviance.

I guess it sounded weird that you brought up that masturbation leads to homosexuality. And bloodletting cures hysteria."
posted at 22:10:40 on June 11, 2013 by Anonymous
Heinous    
"Masturbation could lead also to heinous heterosexual sin as well. Again, those with unwanted homosexual feeling had those feelings long before issues of porn and masturbation...not the other way around."
posted at 22:23:45 on June 11, 2013 by Anonymous
Gateway    
""When a prophet of God states that masturbation can (not always) be a gateway to homosexuality, well, I’m inclined to take his word for it. "

I think we agree on everything but this point, yet there is no evidence of that. A lot of people here mb. How many of them turned to homosexuality? Zero."
posted at 15:41:18 on June 12, 2013 by Anonymous
For some reason    
"the Church apparently doesn't like to use the word "masturbation" over the pulpit. I agree, I think it's lurid in and of itself and doesn't promote obedience. The first "For the Strength of the Youth" pamphlet (for both boys and girls) did use the word, and strongly counseled against it. The version we have now (and have had for years) uses the term "self arousal", and counsels against arousing oneself or others.

In the 70's, a number of the talks at the Priesthood sessions of General Conference addressed the issue openly, and counseled vigorously against it. Also, President Kimball in "The Miracle of Forgiveness" preaches against it, even "a little masturbation". It takes you away from the Spirit of God and will keep you from reaching your full potential.

But don't be led into toxic shame; it will only turn a slip into a full scale relapse if you dote on it too much. Go to your bishop. Tell him what you're thinking and feeling. Then let him help you to fully recover from this. God bless you in your efforts to become clean."
posted at 17:01:37 on June 12, 2013 by dog
I feel strongly about this.    
"Screw you to the Anon with the title "President Kimball gave counsel on masturbation" If you are who I think you are. You're disgusting. If not, then apologies.

Here's the thing. Past speakers do sometimes take it to far one what their personal opinion is. The whole black history with the church is one example I believe. Oral sex being banned for 6 months. I think the church bas backed off if this because there are bigger fish to fry.

We can talk about what someone said 50 hears ago or we can talk about what our current leaders are saying today. They say nothing about masturbation. Its up to the bishops discretion, but even the bishops manual doesn't saying anything on masturbation.


So for are you adults out there that have forgotten what its like to be a celibate teenager with raging hormones, please don't act so high and mighty."
posted at 17:25:56 on June 12, 2013 by mint
Thanks, KICK IT!    
"I have never seen such a great response as to why we should not masturbate. I have searched for some of the references you listed, but I had a hard time finding definitive proof the way you just did. The only reference I knew of was from the Miracle of Forgiveness.

From my experience, masturbation is what opens the door for all kinds of nasty habits. I find that my life feels better when I don't have to masturbate all the time in order to satisfy my carnal urges.

Masturbation can be overcome, even as a young man. I know this because I was able to do it for some long periods of time as a youth, and trust me I had and still have raging hormones. Physical exercise, especially endurance/aerobic exercise seems to be the best remedy for raging hormones. It helped me to tell myself that if I have time to masturbate, I certainly have time for forty push ups, or a quick run through my neighborhood, or a set of crunches, etc...

As I progressed through the SA 12 steps, I learned that surrendering my compulsion for masturbation to the Lord helped draw me nearer to Him."
posted at 23:51:13 on June 12, 2013 by ETTE
Kick it    
"Well done Kick it. I appreciate you referencing all those sources. My experience has been that the Church has always been very frank about talking about masturbation. I hear it discussed frequently and opening as a sin of morality. I hope this discussion stays positive and non-contentious."
posted at 18:00:06 on June 13, 2013 by maddy
Amen to Kick It    
"and I hope you don't think that I think that the Church's viewpoint has softened on this issue just because you don't hear the term used as often. It's just that there are members who never masturbated until they heard the term used by priesthood leaders.

As I mentioned above, the term itself seems somewhat lurid. It was used in the Melchizedek Priesthood/Relief Society Manual about 5 years ago, in a list of other sins that are violations of the law of chastity. Whatever, I would never use the term in Sacrament Meeting, but I would say something like "violations of the law of chastity," or "sexual misbehavior" if I had to. The term itself is just too graphic for my tastes (in open forums attended by people of all ages).

The Church has always been against MB and anything like unto it. The official position of the Church has always been clear and unambiguous. And it has been unwavering. They have always opposed it, no matter the terminology used."
posted at 16:46:49 on June 14, 2013 by dog
The "M" word.    
"The word masturbation in the Church is like Voldemort. We are warned about its dangers yet we can't speak its name. On my mission it was referred to as "self abuse." A college buddy was asked by his Bishop whether he had a problem with masturbation, his sardonic reply was "No, its working out just fine."

I know that we are expected to confess to our Bishop about such transgressions, not sure of the point of it though especially when some Bishops have a problem with discussing it themselves. It really depends on the Bishop whether or not he can help you. In worst case scenarios you feel worse than you did before you went in because you told him something very personal as if it is supposed to lift some burden. Maybe we should be allowed to tell Bishops throughout the Church in code, "Hi Bishop, I have a problem with "m" or a problem with "m" and "p.""
posted at 20:42:02 on June 14, 2013 by stayingclean
Living in a tunel    
"Ya I am very aware of past lectures. So all of you parents, do you guys do oral? Or handjobs? Or 69?

Because surely you have heard of past talks on how we shouldn't do those things. Of course, the church backed off. Some members today staunchly follow those past talks, while others take the "church doesn't get into husband/wifes bedroom" message to heart and do other things besides missionary.

my point? We have prophets that give us modern revelation. I think there is a reason the church has backed off masturbation. Its a huge distraction. The youth are tempted with alcohol, sex, drugs, PORNOGRAPHY, and for some reason we are obsessed with touching ourselves.

Take it as you will. I'm not saying masturbation shouldn't be a sin. I'm saying how we approach and react to the issue should be drastically changed."
posted at 00:35:41 on June 17, 2013 by mint
Here's my "No comment"    
"Evil spirits "want you to question and doubt the DOCTRINES OF THE GOSPEL."

Kick it, are you suggesting that "no oral sex" is a "doctrine of the gospel"? Just because an elder or prophet says something once does not make it a doctrine of the gospel.

Mint, my answer would be exactly what the First Presidency and the Church teach about oral sex today:

NOTHING. "No comment."

There are CERTAINLY going to be circumstances under which it is NOT okay. Husbands, love your wives--and never abuse or use them for your own selfishness. That is WRONG!

There MIGHT be circumstances under which it is fine. You, your spouse, and the Lord will work this one out together. And I personally don't believe anyone is justified in teaching or saying anything other than that.

It is very telling that the link to the First Presidency letter from above comes from www.i4m.com, and the letter cannot be found on any official church source, nor are bishops instructed that way any more.

So, I'm not saying "Go for it!" and I'm not saying, "It's always right." I'm saying exactly what the Church says: No comment.

(Although I'm also suggesting that letter should never be referenced as the source of any gospel doctrine. It is not.)

However, Mint, despite my personal feelings on the subject (i.e., though I MIGHT possibly in some small way like to agree with you that masturbation is no longer talked about either), the analogy of oral sex to masturbation is not perfect.

Oral sex was mentioned by the Brethren ONCE in a single letter, which was RESCINDED, which is not found in official church publications, and which they don't talk about any more. That's a pretty clear indication that it's not one of our core "DOCTRINES." Doctrines are not hidden in a corner.

On the other hand, modern church leaders talked about masturbation MANY times until the 1980s, and they still DO, just with euphemisms, and you CAN still find all their counsel on the subject on lds.org and in other official modern church literature. They have not backed down from this, as they have from their single letter on oral sex."
posted at 13:56:02 on June 17, 2013 by beclean
O Sex    
"I never feel guilty or the absence of the spirit after having O Sex. I guess it must be okay."
posted at 16:38:08 on June 17, 2013 by Anonymous
Another perspective on masturbation by a woman    
"Males are not the only ones affected by masturbation confusion and guilt. As a young wife in my 20s - this was in the early 1970s - there was a big movement among the feminists that focused on "knowing your body." A book called The Joy of Sex was really big. In those days people said a lot that masturbation would make you insane, and I knew it was not something kids were supposed to do, you know, touch your bodies. But I had never heard it described as a sexual sin. So I tried it. It was great! I was having orgasms of the kind I never had during sex with my husband! I don't think this went on for a really long time, because something began to really bother me about it. I guess it was the concept that having sex with myself - and let's face it, that's what masturbation is - was becoming more enjoyable than sex with my husband, whom I loved dearly and we were sealed in the temple. After a lot of reading, prayer and contemplation, I came to the belief that one reason it was evil is that it is "self" gratification - self centeredness when we should be centered outwardly, especially toward Christ, but in the world at least focused not on ourselves. I made a commitment to stop, and I was surprised that it was very, very difficult to stop. For literally YEARS (close to 30, I think) I would wake up at night in a cold sweat because I had dreamed I was masturbating, that in a weak moment I had done it without thinking! I finally calmed myself down by realizing that I only dreamed it, that it wasn't something that I had chosen to do. Then over the next ten years or so I didn't have any problem. Recently I do again, as I am trying to help a loved one who masturbates daily to understand that it is an addiction that he uses as an outlet for who knows-what-all reasons. I do know that he is in prison, where all of the men do it, and he is in love and feels that he is united with the object of his love in the only way he can be. He has pictures of her that he uses to focus on. He is not a member, but from I'm hearing a lot of male members seem to be unaware of how Satan uses the pleasure of self-gratification through masturbation as a tool of slavery."
posted at 20:38:14 on June 17, 2013 by amIlost
Oral sex comment    
"At an Overeaters Anonymous meeting (another 12-step program)I and a few other women were discussing the subject of oral sex. This was before it became "politically correct" to quit calling homosexuality evil and it was still illegal in most if not all states. It came up that oral sex came within the legal definition of sodomy, which is homosexuality. In my own experience, and with these women and other women I had talked to, an awful lot of husbands expected their wives to participate in oral sex. I never liked it, and now I had a reason to object to it, but how do you reconcile refusing your own husband? Some of these women were members married to members and some were not. It's interesting to hear that there is no official standing in the church about the subject. I guess it's one of those things where we shouldn't expect to be "commanded in all things" and should exercise our own judgemnt?"
posted at 20:47:14 on June 17, 2013 by amIlost
Different views are great.    
"Ook.

@Kick It I think BeClean had a great response on the oral Sex. None needed from me. Evil spirits..........you know I've come to your defense because people made fun of you on that. But you use it waaaaay too much. I mean if your response is always evil spirits, than people stop listening because you seem to be repeating yourself. I'm not saying you're wrong. I think we live in a world swimming in evil spirits. But, now that I know that I can't go asking for a blessing everytime I want to do something bad. The way I see it, evil spirits are something you have to deal with. Just like the devil. I'll do everything I can to keep the Holy Ghost by my side, but I'm not going to worry about evil spirits 24/7.


@BeClean I think you answered the oral sex thing beautifully. I definitely agree with you on oral sex being a bad example, but I wanted to point out that the church does take things back sowmtimes. I could've references the whole black people thing, but that's getting out there.

On oral sex. The way I see that is just like I'd see other worldy things. Video games, un-spiritual music, Hollywood. Do these things really bring us closer to God? No. Yet we Mormons do them because they're fun. We're not being evil, its just culture. If we lived absolutely perfect lives, I doubt anyone would have oral sex; in fact I doubt anyone would have sex for pleasure/romance. What's the point? I mean how many of you can say you have never had sex because you wanted not only the romance, but the pleasure of being with that person. Ita not holy to like having sex, sounds greedy to some Mormons, but God gave us these urges.

Anyeay, on Masturbation!! I would never encourage masturbation. Whati absolutely hate is the way parents react to their kids doing. Shock! I thought he was a good boy. His salvation is at risk. I have to fix his addiction or else he'll never get married.
Those type of reactions disgust me. There is so much psychological damage done because gor most of us teenage boys, masturbation is mostly not a choice. I hated to do it. I would've have given anything to not do it. But I did it, over and over again. My hormones were overpowering. I was going through puberty!

my point is, masturabation is not like a prom addiction or alcohol addiction. Its mostly a phase youth go through before they get married and.....how should I put it....release those urges with their beloveds. No I still don't encourage masturbation. But I beg you parents, especially moms because you cannot relate to being a boy, to be sensitive on this. Don't make them feel guilty or throw around the word addiction. They are 100X better than other young kids in the world, don't make them feel like dirt for masturbating.

@AmiLost. See my above comments."
posted at 21:25:23 on June 17, 2013 by mint
it's all the same thing    
"Mint, per my understanding, whether it's porn, or masturbation, it's the same - it's sexual addiction. The thing is, you can be running thoughts of prior porn viewing while you masturbate without actually viewing during the act. And while I can't speak for others, I can tell you that for me, the urges are THE SAME as when I was a teenager. Really. No difference. And getting married is not a cure for sexual addiction. If that were so, why are there so many of us married guys here?"
posted at 21:41:31 on June 17, 2013 by notsostrong
Thats where we disagree    
"I don't think a teen who masturbates has a sexual addiction. Putting that in the same pool with Pornography, Pedophilia, Adultry, or Voyersim amazes me!

Its those type of reactions that make young Mormons feel absolutely horrible. Haha well you must be one hormonal guy because I am no where near as bad as I was when I was 12. You have to remember people used to get married early, like 18. They probably did masturbate but when they got married the issue kind of went away. Nowdays, with college and everything we hold off on marriage. That's why so many people are addicted to porn, because nit only is it addictive but once you get started you never feel worthy and take forever to get married but those urges are the still there from youth.

But see I don't think sex cures sexual addictions. Like I said I don't think masturbation is a sex addition. It can be, but for the vast majority of us it isn't. Pornography is not hormonal thing. Its a mental addiction. We use our bodies to satisfy it.


But ya. I don't know if you have kids. But if you do I hope you're not hard on then for jerking off. Its something almost every teen guy goes through and I don't think it makes us evil. We are young and still trying to figure out our testimonies. Life is difficult at this age with all the REAL addictions out there on top of not feeling good enough in church. Best of luck."
posted at 22:00:26 on June 17, 2013 by mint
our quirks    
"Kick it has to tell us to cast out evil spirits every time he posts.

Whenever Mint posts, he has to tell us that masturbation is normal and not addictive.

Now I'm curious, what do I write every single time I post?"
posted at 22:13:35 on June 17, 2013 by beclean
Mom's can't relate    
"Are you joking?

What makes men think that women don't have unbelievable urges in youth or even when they get older?

I have never been able to understand this can someone please explain this fallacy?

However in regards to urges when Satan comes pounding on the door you kick him to the curb! That's how you control urges!

We would like to think that most people are being enticed by and even possessed by evil spirits because that is much nicer than thinking someone has joined the dark side of filth with Satan and his cronies.

This would mean they no longer need enticement or possession they have actually crossed over and become one of his henchmen.

These are they that are as numerous as the sand on the seashore and as the stars in the heavens. (Gospel principals)"
posted at 22:25:03 on June 17, 2013 by Anonymous
hahah beclean    
"Your post always have something funny yo say I suppose. You remind me of a Redditer, except they are so difficult to debate with.

Ya I feel I'm too inexperienced to give advice with sex addictions. I'm not knowledge enough to counsel anyone on the gospel. I have never done drugs so I have no value to add there. The list goes on.

What makes me different is I'm young and give a different perspective. I think Masturbation is the only thing I can legitimately say I have a place to opine. I've thought very hard on this topic and my past experience with living in a house where no one talks about sex, gives me a view that could be valuable to someone.

If you just making a joke, than lol good one.

@Anon I can say without a doubt most moms can't relate to their teens sons. I'm not being sexist its just genes. We are made differently."
posted at 22:38:48 on June 17, 2013 by mint
I do have sons    
"And I can tell you, that masturbation is something that is taken seriously. It will keep you from serving a mission if it is not overcome. I have two sons who have not been able to serve for that very reason. I realize that there are many missionaries out there serving who do have a problem and still serve. Perhaps their bishops or stake presidents do not take it as seriously as ours does here. Or, more than likely, they were not completely honest when they were in their pre-mission interviews. I would be curious to know if wives of husbands who masturbate feel it's okay. I posted at the bottom a link to one wife wife who doesn't think so. Here is a quote from her blog that I think explains things pretty well:

"Now I don't know which is worse. Is it worse to watch pornography or is it worse to fantasize about having sex (etc etc), envisioning and streaming pornography in your mind? I don't know. Both are bad. It doesn't matter which might be worse, but I now understand that Jack only struggling with masturbation at the moment and staying clean of porn isn't necessarily progress. It is, but it isn't. It is. It's good that he is clean on one side. But it isn't. It's worse than I realized. "

I can tell you that my wife does not think so. And believe me, if your wife thinks is a problem, then it IS a problem. Perhaps the question should be worded differently. How many wives think it's perfectly okay for their husbands to masturbate?

If, as I suspect, there are none, or very few out there, then I think you can see that masturbating will cause trouble in a marriage. And as I mentioned earlier, if masturbation is a habit/addiction before marriage, simply getting married will not make it go away.

I will agree that masturbation is not the same in the church's eyes as having sex outside of marriage with another person. There is also a big difference between having masturbated in the past, and having it be something that occurs on a regular basis. The basis of all of this is lust. In SA, the very definition of sexual sobriety is that we have no sex anyone, including one's self, with the exception of your spouse, and a progressive victory over lust. It is lust that must be overcome. If that is done, then any form of acting out will be overcome as well.

http://12stepswithchrist.blogspot.com/2013/06/finding-strength-in-atonement.html"
posted at 05:01:54 on June 18, 2013 by notsostrong
compulsions, compulsions, compulsions    
"When an evil spirit has possessed you, you are no longer just lusting or being aroused, or being tempted, or just getting that inner feeling of libido arousal. You are suffering from such a strong compulsion that you have to Masturbate or look at porn or you will just about go crazy? Yeh we get it!

Other people experience this to but some have learnt to master control and knew early on exactly where there temptation was coming from and nipped it in the bud or stopped the thought at the door before it became an addiction and then compulsions to act.

I am sure there are lots of women on this site who have felt this over whelming temptation / compulsion and still feel this? Men are not the only ones. I bet if you had a discussion you would all be feeling very similar experiences of overwhelming arousal and a compulsion to act on it?

Are the men on this site listening to the women who have the same problem? They are suffering the same symptoms? COMPULSIONS to act on aroused sexual feelings? It is not rocket science?

I don't understand why Mint's problems are more unique and special compared to everyone else's? Like he knows for sure that he is experiencing worse conditions / compulsions compared to everyone else especially WOMEN?

It may have something to do with the men's so called higher libido fallacy. This is like comparing a man and woman who both have stage 3 throat cancer but for some unknown reason the man is suffering worse than the woman because it was a theory / fallacy about three thousand years ago that men suffer worse throat cancer than women do??

I think you will find that some men have really high libido and so do some women and on the other hand some men have low libido and so do some women. Sexual sin is not a high libido problem. Sexual sins are perversions and compulsions that come from Satan."
posted at 06:38:44 on June 18, 2013 by Anonymous
From my personal mission statement    
"Mint, I long wanted to rationalize my masturbation, and I will never judge anyone harshly who indulges on rare occasion — for several reasons. However, the following paragraphs from my personal mission statement explain my decision to avoid it.

As a joint-heir to God, I cannot hide, excuse, or rationalize even the least of my "gateway" sins and shortcomings, nor can I waste any of the precious time God has given me in sin, because I cannot afford to destroy my confidence in God's presence or to trade "all that the Father hath" for some pottage. If I place one foot in sin or selfishness, that river can carry me over the waterfall. All hidden things must be revealed, and like a devouring fire or thief in the night, one stupid act can rob me an instant of everything I am creating.

I do not need to be perfect, but I must improve. Great mountains are moved, challenges are overcome, large ships are built, financial and temporal goals are achieved, sea become dry land, physical appetites and passions are conquered, and weaknesses become strengths with God, with small, simple steps over many years, and with charity, cheer, consistency, humility, and patience."
posted at 12:56:10 on June 18, 2013 by beclean
wow    
"This thread has turned very interesting to read. Anywhere from masturbation to oral sex, to the infamous letter that supposedly bans LDS members from oral sex, etc.

My two cents? I agree that the evil spirit talk is a bit much. You can I only beat a dead horse so many times. This mint dude reminds me of that other dude that was on here a while ago, who was he... Moronidenovo... Was that his name? He fiercely defended MB just like mint does. He was young and nobody understood or remembered being a teenager like him and all the hormones that go with it. Dude, I've been masturbating longer than you've been alive! I think I have some experience in this arena.

All I want to say is that if you think marriage or a mission will cure you of your sexual addiction (because that's what it is) then you're crazy. More power to you, but I'm living proof that that's not the case. I didn't get screwed up with porn until 2 years into my marriage. Wasn't even a temptation as a youth. Now it is and I can't stop. BUT I still can't stop the masturbation either. Its an addiction. That's what it is.

The"
posted at 13:44:55 on June 18, 2013 by asdfjkl1234
pasg age restriction    
"Just a reminder that PASG and SA mtgs. are presently for adults 18 yrs. or older only, unless a special youth only program has been set up in the area. Too bad, huh?
I have lots of sympathy for you. Your letter does illustrate how a hard-line stance may induce shame, which worsens addiction. IMHO, coming to an understanding of God's unconditional love for each of us helps alleviate the shame. One thing that I've found very helpful was to read the near-death experience survivor stories of those who have seen the other side, and to hear of the remarkable grace that is extended there. www.near-death.com has a great collection. Your new Bishop sounds inexperienced. Soon, I'm betting, his stance will soften. All bishops deal with this more than any other single sin, methinks. SA is working for me better than anything else ever has. May good luck and God's grace attend you!"
posted at 14:54:05 on June 18, 2013 by Anonymous
What if    
"...we concluded empirically or by the unequivocal declaration of Almighty God himself (not just a First Presidency "interpretation") that kisses anywhere but the lips were a reprehensible abomination? That masturbations was situated on the sin/righteousness continuum of spacetime just beyond an occasional cuss word? That homosexuality is totally okay? Or what if we found out 100% that the reverse for all said scenario's was absolutely true? No more need to speculate within ourselves or to contend one with another. For we knew nothing doubting. Where would that leave us? Where would that leave the seasoned addict? Where would that leave the youth aflame with lust and desire? Where would that leave the bitter and suffering wife? The kids? Where would that leave us?

"It's just as if a man were wounded with an arrow thickly smeared with poison. His friends & companions, kinsmen & relatives would provide him with a surgeon, and the man would say, 'I won't have this arrow removed until I know whether the man who wounded me was a noble warrior, a priest, a merchant, or a worker.' He would say, 'I won't have this arrow removed until I know the given name & clan name of the man who wounded me... until I know whether he was tall, medium, or short... until I know whether he was dark, ruddy-brown, or golden-colored... until I know his home village, town, or city... until I know whether the bow with which I was wounded was a long bow or a crossbow... until I know whether the bowstring with which I was wounded was fiber, bamboo threads, sinew, hemp, or bark... until I know whether the shaft with which I was wounded was wild or cultivated... until I know whether the feathers of the shaft with which I was wounded were those of a vulture, a stork, a hawk, a peacock, or another bird... until I know whether the shaft with which I was wounded was bound with the sinew of an ox, a water buffalo, a langur, or a monkey.' He would say, 'I won't have this arrow removed until I know whether the shaft with which I was wounded was that of a common arrow, a curved arrow, a barbed, a calf-toothed, or an oleander arrow.' The man would die and those things would still remain unknown to him."

— Cula-Malunkyovada Sutta: The Shorter Instructions [of Gautama Buddha] to Malunkya"

Got bored thought I'd lurk. Can't lurk. I must engage. Oh irony :) Anyway, that's my 2. Back to my hiatus. Love."
posted at 17:29:24 on June 18, 2013 by They_Speak
Oh Man...THEY SPEAK!!!!    
"I've missed you, Bro!


STAY!"
posted at 23:14:38 on June 18, 2013 by Anonymous
Amen, Kick It. Amen    
"You can't argue with scripture.

Of course, not everyone interprets it the same way.

But, how I interpreted what you said, I agree with every word."
posted at 00:31:32 on June 23, 2013 by beclean
Well well well    
"Look who decided to show up lol.

I'll do some quick replies.

To NotStrong: I'll say, I feel bad for you kids on that front. I'd hate my dad tring to listen if in masturbating. Be weird. And I can almost guarantee that masturbation is THE reason they're not going. There is probably something else going on. It could be porn.

To Anon"Compulsions" Ehh a teenager who masturbates is not doing it because they're compulsive. Its hormones. Jeez.

To Beclean "my personal" Ya of course. I don't rationalize masturbation. I'm all about changing our approach because the church completely ignores it. This leaves an opening to treat it individually, and this what you get. Parents saying its compulsions or very serious.

To ASDFJKF123497: Ya people love to discuss. And :). Sexual addiction, the term is thrown around too loosely.

To Anon "psg" I know right! I don't know why people think teenagers have the same resources and situation as adults. I'm not sure a kid who madturbates should be exposed to the world of REAL addiction.

To TheySpeak: ah speak. Nice entrance. I will say I have no idea what you're talking about. I'm not sure what any of that meant, but I'm sure it meant aowthing good. Look forward to your comments :-)

To Kick it: Ya you look at the world as if you're not in the world. We are here, we must understand each other. If we pass judgment and see other peoples voices as "worldy" then we can't coexist.

BeClean: Yep, interpretations. I could take anything and apply it to sownthing else. No point in doing that tho.




Alright guys, might take a few days, or weeks, idk. But! I am going to write an EPIC post on masturbation. I'll slit my spiel and hopefully you guys are open minded. Till then :)"
posted at 15:43:07 on June 23, 2013 by mint
epic post?    
"self control.

I have no problem with the idea that people are imperfect and nearly everyone will indulge in your favorite pastime.

But if after all your previous writing you still feel like you have to justify your self love to everyone else, it's obviously causing you an unhealthy amount of concern.

If it causes you no feelings of guilt or shame or depression or regret
Or lust or selfishness or laziness
If you're confident you're not wasting your God-given time (life is short!)
If you don't wonder whether you're still worthy to hold the priesthood—because you know you are
If you can stand confidently before God and your Mom
And serve in all capacities in the church without questioning your worthiness
If you pray honestly to God to know what to repent of, and masturbation never comes to mind
If your Bishop let's you go to the temple and serve a mission despite your actions
And if you're confident your wife will have no problem with your actions
And, finally, if you can persuade God at the last day that it was the right thing to do

Then by all means, keep doing it!

But, there's no need to persuade the rest of us.

As you like to remind us, we were all 17 once. We tried as hard as we could to justify that that we were doing was perfectly acceptable.

Now we're older.

I love you, Man. I keep picturing you as my 17-year-old brother. We've talked about this stuff a bunch. So, I love you, Bro.

I don't judge you. I've made all the same mistakes as you and then some.

I just wish I hadn't, and so I wish you wouldn't, either. It's not fun.

But, as long as you've chosen to indulge, I don't think there's any need to persuade the rest of the Church that you are right. It's OK."
posted at 21:14:36 on June 23, 2013 by beclean
Um    
"I'm not trying to convince anyone that masturbating is ok. What I'm trying to do is help put the teens out there. Maybe if you parents read what I have to say, you might just say, wow, I forgot how it felt to be in that position. Or maybe I shouldn't be so hard on Johnny, he's been such a good boy.

That's the only reason I say anything. I don't do it to impress anyone. I don't do it to convince you adults. Its to human an issue that is so taboo we never hear the word in church, YET we have people like Kick It saying we won't go to the Celestial Kingdom because of it.

That's why I comment. Do you see my purpose or do you stand by what you said about me?"
posted at 01:33:43 on June 24, 2013 by mint
Kickit    
"I'm " pointing out things that other people are doing wrong", like what?

And it so easy for someone like to just say "You and anyone else with this problem can stop, too." Apparently you have forgotten. If there was one thing I wanted tin the world when I was young, it was to stop masturbating. One thing! I would've given anything. I gave my 100% effort and still couldn't. Then, someone like you, just says "Oh you can just stop."

oh come on, you're exactly the type of person in talking about. I don't consider masturbation addiction (although it can be) haven't you ever heard of a bishop say to a porn addict "Why don't you just stop??" Why? Because it's not that simple. Its not they way he thinks it is.

And no offense kick it, but isn't your childhood, a little different. I am specifically talking about teens with just masturbation issues. Throw in porn, sex, or other things....the whole thing changes. But if I do remember correctly, you never experienced the innocence of just masturbating, never doing anything before or after. If I'm wrong about your childhood, sorry."
posted at 11:06:41 on June 24, 2013 by mint
What did I say about you?    
"Somehow, the first couple paragraphs of my earlier post got erased before the words "self control." Sorry, I can't remember what I said.

Mint, of course I stand by what I said. As I read it again, I believe every single word I said.

In fact, I can't figure out what word you would even think I should change.

You say, "Do I stand by what I said about you?"

What did I say about you?

I said I love you. Yes. I stand by that."
posted at 19:15:08 on June 24, 2013 by beclean
Mint    
"Oh ya I forgot to comment on the good stuff you said. Thank you :)

Well some things you said that I would not agree with at all:

" if after all your previous writing you still feel like you have to justify your self love to everyone else, it's obviously causing you an unhealthy amount of concern."

-Um, this is a new post and I doubt this guy is going to go through dozens of comments to find my opinion. And I've hardly been here the past 8 months, I don't see how that's an "unhealthy amount of concern.

"there's no need to persuade the rest of us"

- I explained how that's exactly what I'm not doing. I don't want to convince you guys that jerking is rad. My first goal is to ease the shame and fear youth have. 2nd is to help them out because I've been there. 3rd is to hopefully help adults understand what its like to be in our position and that they should be prude or hardasses.

Now if you don't like my goals, that's one thing. But don't try to make me out as some teen who wants acceptance from you guys so I can whack in peace. I couldn't care less if any of you look down at me for that."
posted at 22:06:45 on June 24, 2013 by mint
Genuine?    
"I seem to recall you were going to write an epic post about masturbation, and you hoped we would all be open minded.

Why do we need to be open minded, unless you're trying to persuade us to see things your way?

If all you want to say is that God stll loves and helps teens who masturbate, no one disagrees.

If your goal is really to ease shame and help teens know they are OK, why do all your posts put forth such contentious challenges and arguments?

It definitely feels like you are trying to persuade everyone that their opinion of masturbation is prudish and outdated."
posted at 09:26:22 on June 25, 2013 by beclean
I'm going back to some of your original comments    
"one of which said (and this is the key to your problem): "About three weeks later I had A particularly awful day and used masturbation as a way to reduce my stress level." BINGO!

Do you see here that you are an addict? This is what we addicts do. We self medicate. And the problem isn't your hormone levels. The problem is that you're evading fear, pain, stress, etc., through an illegitimate means.

This is a psychological problem as much as a spiritual problem. And you probably won't be able to overcome this without guidance and instruction. I would suggest you get the LDS 12 Step Manual (LDS Family Services "Addiction Recovery Program" ) and WORK THE STEPS. Read the first paragraph in Step One over and over and over again until you understand it. Then you'll begin to understand yourself and what it is you're actually doing. And until you do that, you might not begin to prosper spiritually.

This will be a positive process. It won't be about abstaining from something. It will be about building a relationship with Jesus that changes your very nature in a positive way so that you won't have cravings and uncontrollable urges that you do now. Your sexual desire will not only be just as strong, it will likely be stronger. But your very nature will have changed so that you "no longer have the disposition to do evil" but have only the disposition to do good continually (Mosiah 5:2). So you won't have to white knuckle every moment of the day and night. You will have experienced true conversion, a change of your very nature.

This doesn't mean that it won't take effort on your part. But most of that effort will be in the form of discovering yourself and what makes you tick, and admitting it. Then working on it with the Savior to experience true healing.

I think it shows great determination on your part that you read the Book of Mormon in 3 weeks. That's admirable. I would suggest reading 1-3 chapters per day now. This will not cure you, but it will be a help to you. Most likely, you will have to call upon multiple resources to help you with this. Be certain to include your Bishop in this, and meet with him at least every other week to discuss how you're doing with the 12 Steps (DO them!).

I want to see you go on a mission at age 18 and not have to delay it because of a problem like this. There IS healing, there IS a way to overcome it, but it's not going to be easy, and you won't be able to do it alone. You will come to understand the Savior's Atoning Sacrifice in a way that many non-addicts can't (in this life).

Remember, "I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.""
posted at 11:07:18 on June 25, 2013 by dog
Ehh    
"What's wrong with being open minded? Didn't know that was a bad thing to ask.

You seem to think I'm trying to convince something different about masturbation. Like I wasn't you to think it's ok. But that's not why I comment. I already told you, there are people here who haven't really heard what I've said. You just happen to be one of the few who have.

I do think the way you guys treat masturbation is prude. Outdated? I don't know about that. But if you guys really feel you're doing a great job with your kids, awsome. Good for you. I'll say this again, I write this for them and if you'd like an opinion from a teenager who's not afraid to speak up, here I am. If not, that's totally fine with me.

Maybe a kid will read my blog and feel like its ok to be human. Maybe a parent we read it and be a little more understanding. Maybe. Ok definitely not trying to convince you, or Kick It, or Dog, or others who obviously have their thinking set. Its for those who are looking for advice or perspective.

And one last bit is to finally put this rough idea have into a better thought out post. That's for me.




To Dog: Um, you quoted the original poster. That wasn't me. You guys do realize that I didn't post this right?

Even with that, What teen doesn't have fears, anxious feelings, insecurity, low self esteem???

Ya I would've liked to go on my mission at 18 but that's not going to happen. And from the looks of it this kid won't either. 6 months is horribly long."
posted at 12:48:22 on June 25, 2013 by mint
I wasn't talking to you.    
": )"
posted at 19:32:47 on June 25, 2013 by dog
Mint    
"I am with you all the way..."
posted at 22:08:04 on June 25, 2013 by Created
Why do you defend masturbation so intently Mint?    
"Satan is not your friend!

If Masturbation has contributed to your fears, anxiety, insecurity and increased your already low self esteem then why do you view it as such a normal and natural part of growing up?

If you don't have an addiction to Masturbation like you say and if it is really not as bad as it seems then why are you here on the ADDICTION BLOG? Are you here to teach people that Masturbation is not an addiction?

What do you want from us?

What I see is many people care deeply about you and see that you are a really good young man?

However as soon as someone says something that you don't want to hear (truth) you say that they are to old and don't remember being young and that they are being to hard on you?

There are a lot of people who started out like you thinking that they could control the situation and it wasn't a big deal and for some that was like 20 to 30 years ago. They are still battling this horrid addiction and are trying to help you see the light."
posted at 04:46:52 on June 26, 2013 by Anonymous
Mint    
"Well, what it meant was open ended. The answers to my what if questions may vary; as the interpretation of the parable. He that has eyes to see let him see. Happy searching my friend :)"
posted at 20:38:29 on July 6, 2013 by they_speak


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"Are you battling a demon of addiction—tobacco or drugs, or the pernicious contemporary plague of ography? Whatever other steps you may need to take to resolve these concerns, come first to the gospel of Jesus Christ. Trust in heaven’s promises. In that regard Alma's testimony is my testimony: "I do know," he says, "that whosoever shall put their trust in God shall be supported in their trials, and their troubles, and their afflictions."

— Jeffrey R. Holland

General Conference, April 2006