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Sharing inventory
By BELUGA
6/2/2013 6:55:23 PM
Today, as part of the ARP 12 step program,I started on step 5. I wrote a confessional narrative of my life. It detailed all my lust, pornography,and masturbation addiction driven behavior over my entire life. It was almost 40 pages long! I prayed about it,that things would come to my remembrance that I needed to get rid of. I had a 2 page addendum after I was finished, of nagging,lingering things i have done. I read this in it's entirity to the Bishop today.
This was a huge step,something I never thought I would be willing to do.I may not realize how big a step this was,but right now I feel pretty good. Being prayerful about it was a great experience for me. i went solely by the spirit and wrote down everything I was directed to share. I feel like all my dark "corners" and "hiding places" were cleaned out.
I share this because it is understated about how important the PASG program is. It has changed my heart. Meeting with other men who are going through recovery and that are members of the church is key. I always felt alienated from fellow memebers of the church because I felt like a freak. Not anymore. This addiction thrives in isolation and talking about it with other men{something we don't do as men,generally} that want to become the priesthood leaders they should,is powerful. We need to take the elephant out of the room and bludgeon it!
I feel i have gained an understanding of the atonement that i lacked all of my life as a member of the church. I was held back because of pride. Christ's love is real. You have to be honest and enlist others to help you. I have discovered prayer . i didn't want to pray because i felt like a scumbag. That was satan's lie.The PASG program has taught me so much about the atonement.

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Thank you    
"For sharing recovery!!!"
posted at 01:12:39 on June 3, 2013 by Hero


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