Problem or the Symptom
By stayingclean
3/17/2013 8:34:09 PM
I binge on p&m for about a day for about 4-5 times a year. I am trying to quite it altogether and then forever. So far I am on 31 days clean. I have heard it said that p@rn is a symptom of other issues. I believe that is true though I welcome any other thoughts on the matter. 50% of my problem is access. If I did not have access to it, I probably would not indulge. When I go without it for a while I don't think about when I can get another fix. The other 50% is recognizing innocuous paths that may lead me to it. There is not that many but anything more than one is plenty. That is what I am focusing on right now. Staying away. Staying far away. I am also trying to lean on the Lord's power to keep me from these paths and to keep my thoughts clean most of all. Not just trying to white knuckle my way through unwanted urges but to think of good and wholesome things that bring me inner peace.


I think yoir doing great    
"5 times a year. I would love to have that record, even if I've only been addicted for a year and a half. Ghats long to me but I compared to some I guess it really isn't.

Anyway, I think you are on the right track. The part where you say if you didn't have access you'd be fine with no problem, that's an amazing advantage. There are some people, that when they dont have access they go to great lengths to get there. Mounting up credit card bills, going on "trips" to have an excuse to binge, idk people get creative. My point is, I think you are close to getting to that point of being able to stop.

I'm not wise, but it seems like a lot of spiritual strengthening like scripture study and church will cure you completely. That's my biggest problem. I try to figure out what's wrong with me and when it comes down to it, I'm not studying the Lords word enough and that's what gibes me real strength. The highs I get from church are great, but I need to do a lot more personal study that will give me that steady flow of spiritual strength."
posted at 21:52:36 on March 17, 2013 by mint
Scripture Study and Church    
"Thanks for your encouragement MINT. I read my scriptures "almost" everyday so I guess that entitlements to "almost" all the blessings that I need. I need to do more."
posted at 22:14:03 on March 17, 2013 by stayingclean
"For my husband it is a symptom. It is a symptom of deep, deep pain. He turned to sex addiction because it made him feel good for a moment in time. When he felt low or hurt or bad about himself that was when pulled him the strongest.

The more I study the more I realize it is also a symptom of pride. It shows us our distance from God. Sex addiction isn't the real problem. It is not loving our God with all our power and doing His will that is the real problem. That is why avoiding porn or sex or whatever doesn't fix what ails us. It is only by seeking Him fully that SA slips away from us.

FWIW - I think you are asking the right questions. Bless you."
posted at 21:12:09 on March 18, 2013 by maddy
amen, Maddy    
"Pride is my problem... Surrender the only solution.

I believe those still struggling--addicts and spouses--would do well to always listen to Maddy. She knows what she's talking about. And she's way nicer and more humble with her thoughts than I."
posted at 22:25:14 on March 18, 2013 by beclean

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"Don’t live your life in despair, feeling sorry for yourself because of the mistakes you have made. Let the sunshine in by doing the right things—now. It may be difficult to begin, but pick up the scriptures and immerse yourself in them. Look for favorite passages. Lean on the Master’s teachings, on His servants’ testimonies. Refresh your parched soul with the word of God. The scriptures will give you comfort and the strength to overcome. "

— Richard G. Scott

General Conference May 1990