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Consequences of binging?
By anon16
12/16/2012 2:19:40 PM
Yesterday I did something I'd not done for a long time. I binged with mb. I've had my slips, don't get me wrong, but I've done a lot better not binging. It has only happened one other time all semester like this. This was different though.

I have a boyfriend. Wonderful, sweet guy. I completely objectified him yesterday. I used him. I've set up boundaries of not kissing, because I know myself well enough that I would go further if I kissed. We almost kissed yesterday and I didn't care. I wanted him to kiss me/make out.

What happened is this. I slipped once in the morning. I snapped. I didn't care but I refrained from slipping further. Kept myself busy, then went to lunch and spent some time with boyfriend. We were just sitting on the couch like normal, but when his arm was around me, I made sure it was closer to my hip then my side, stuff like that. Not obvious, but obvious enough for me to get turned on. Then I went and slipped and binged.

Later, I went to a final and got through the rest of the afternoon, realizing that I didn't have the spirit.I still really don't. Then I watched 3 movies back to back. Not terrible movies. But I was flirtatious in a way I'm not normally.

I put my arm on on his thigh by "accident" and left it there. I constantly touched him in some way, and was kind of close when there were "scary" parts. By the third movie, I was kind of laying in his lap, his arm on my stomach. We almost kissed like I said when we were like that.

What should I do? Is this as bad as I am thinking? I'm woefully inexperienced. But I know it turned me on, which wasn't a good thing.

Comments:

Dear binger    
"Thanks for posting Anon16! Yeah, it's a big deal. You are driving 100 mph straight toward the cliff with your bf as a passenger. Time to apply some serious brake and evasive steering. Have you read the blog "By the Light of Grace"? Sidreis is her name. LDS woman with incredible experience and insight. Best wishes!"
posted at 11:45:26 on December 20, 2012 by Anonymous
Been there    
"Hang in there, Anon16. Dating can be pretty rough for us females eith lust issues. For me, when my thoughts delved into the bad thought zone, these thoughts almost always wound up becoming reality. Remember to be careful because all things are created twice."
posted at 04:17:45 on December 21, 2012 by Anonymous
You're making your life harder    
"Just stop trying to repress your sexuality, it's very unhealthy and is causing you phycological trauma. Do what thou wilt. You will only have regrets if you look into the past as if was the present."
posted at 01:35:35 on January 7, 2013 by Anonymous


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"I will speak briefly of the principle of repentance. How grateful I am for the understanding we have of this great principle. It is not a harsh principle, as I thought when I was a boy. It is kind and merciful. The Hebrew root of the word means, simply, "to turn," or to return, to God. Jehovah pled with the children of Israel: "Return . . . and I will not cause mine anger to fall upon you: for I am merciful . . . and I will not keep anger for ever. Only acknowledge thine iniquity, that thou hast transgressed against the Lord thy God." When we acknowledge our sins, confess them and forsake them, and turn to God, He will forgive us."

— Richard G. Hinckley

General Conference April 2006