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im back
By chiswright
10/19/2012 9:33:00 PM
Hey guys, im back. And oh my gosh, i messed up bad. but there is a story with it.

So there is some good news that i can report. I did make my record of 9 days, the best ive gotten in a long time. since then, i havent been able to make it 5 days... the reason i tell you this is so that i can report my experiences with you. one week this month, i want you guys just to take everything electronic that you have, and put it away. this will work like crazy. when you get bored, read your scriptures. this will result in one of the best weeks (or longer) of your addiction's life. Just be sure to hide your stuff, maybe with someone that knows of your addiction, or just somewhere you cannot remember easily or is not easily accessable to you. (i know this might cause working conflicts, so dont do this if that is the case.)

Here comes the story. i have been watching a youtube series in my spare time. in this series, it mentions a meme website that i had no idea about called 4c**** (name bleeped for security) if you would get to know me really, i love memes and stuff like that. so i decided to check this site out. I went to the site, snd there was a link to porn on the website...i was so weak...but this series that had been so innocent...how could it mention something so vile and evil???

Fellow soon to be not addicts...please help me...i have become addicted to porn. i have been slowly losing hope...im so desperate...and the thought scares me. this addiction is really taking me under. so i thought for a little bit, and i think i never really understood step one...can you guys help me with this, msyve give me tips or something? this is terrible...

I know this is way off topic on an addiction website, but i also need some social help...i mention this here because i think it might be some subconsious factor in my addiction...i went to a party the other night with 2 other guys and a bunch of girls...they all payed attention to the 2 others almost the whole time. the girls werent exactly being mean to me...they just kind of acted like i wasnr there...if i said something, sure, they would acknowledge it, but they would never voulnteer something to me...i literally felt forever alone...but then i realized this happens all the time to me...can you guys give me tips with this?

I need some serious help...i cant last more than four days sober...-chis

Comments:

I see    
"Unfortunately I know exactly what website you are talking about... There can be some ok things about it, and perhaps some funny things, but... It's evil. Stay away from it. It took me a long time to stop going to that site even though I was only going for certain things that were not related to my problem. But even then, it is too evil, apply President Dieter F. Uchtdorf 2 word sermon "Stop It".

Try going to a website that is still fun and has memes but is less threatening like re**** (name is also bleeped for security, if you don't know what it is then you have not wasted too much time on the Internet yet.) Which is another thing, your probably spending too much time on the Internet anyway, er, well, download the scriptures on your computer (google ldsview) and search for random words or topics, it's fun and you can learn a lot.

Many people can explain Step 1... For me it meant I had to surrender my flawed plans and train of thought, it means I had to give up on my ideas that I could free myself from this trap. It was obvious that my plan was not working and that I had lost control of myself. I assume your plan is not working for you either. We surrender, but that doesn't mean we give up, we then come to understand that God can help us and change us, we put our trust in him and we fallow his will.

You will progress as fast as you want to. There are many things we cannot control, but there are many things we can! In step 3 that is where you take that action and fill your life with all the things God wants you to do. Your helpless over your addiction, fine, but you can still read your scriptures every day, you can still attend seminary every day, or institute, family night, boy scouts... Fill up your day with what God would want you to do... Sometimes I would find that I would not read my scriptures and I felt like I could not (because I was powerless?) No, there are things we are powerless over, but there are many things we still can act on, we have to be honest with ourselves. If there is something we are not willing to do then we may still be stuck on Step 1, (where we think our plan is better than God's.)

It can take time; our self-will can really slow us down. I didn't want to read my scriptures, I didn't think I could (or I blinded myself into thinking I could not), but eventually the pain helped me surrender, it's sad but we usually do not give up until we hit rock bottom. Don’t panic, God loves you, and he knows the efforts you are trying to make, don’t give up, keep going, get help, and talk to somebody that will love you no matter what. Write to God (yes I love writing God letters now) It helps me to be honest with myself and to feel God’s love.

o.o

Gondor

http://www.salifeline.org/UnderstandPornographyBkWeb.pdf />
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7CcvtoZ6Ra0 />
http://ldsview.byu.edu/LDSView/LV-home.html />
(copy the links without the /> and paste in the address bar to get it to work)"
A Suitable Substitute    
"We came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves can restore us to sanity....

Yes, we addicts are insane...We are looking for something, and we use acting out in our auctions to try to fill a void...But what we get, is more emptiness, because when we act out in last, this just creates more lust. It can be rather painful. What I think seems to make matters worse is that we now live in this information age where we don't actually have to go out and interact with others. Thus, we turn inward.

Some things have helped me. So I will trail you these things as a voice of experience. In SA and in church, I've learned that service and gratitude both minimize lust. These things get us outside of ourselves. These things help us become more like the Savior, who didn't do even one selfish thing in his life. He continually looked outward.

Good luck on your journey and don't lose hope. Remember It is the adversary who wants us to feel discouraged and hopeless."
posted at 07:57:47 on October 21, 2012 by G1rlie
white american mormon women are beyond me...    
"Sorry about your experience at the party, that used to happen to me as well when I still pursued white American Mormon women (WAMW). Luckily for me, I have always been naturally attracted to women with dark skin, and I only pursued WAMW because I wanted to please my parents. There are so many other options though!

The reason those girls ignored you is probably because you are not outgoing enough. I know that is why I use to be ignored by WAMW. I have no idea why, but I can guarantee you that anytime a group of white American Mormon women get together and start making one of their lists of qualities a man should have, "outgoing" will always be on that list. Handsome or well-built are much less likely to be there.

The women I met in Sweden also made these lists but outgoing was never mentioned because that trait is seen as a vice there, being too friendly or loud is obnoxious in many cultures. Also, I think most WAMW have huge egos and expectations that are out of this world. I've dated WAMW, Russians, Mexicans, Koreans, Caribbean, a woman from Nigeria, and I'm currently in a relationship with a Kenyan woman. From my experience, nobody is harder to please than white American Mormon women. I heard about a recent study that showed evidence that less than half of single white American men in their twenties are interested in white American women. Their reasons we're very similar to my reasons for not being interested.

I recommend trying outside your race. If you must be with a white woman, then try foreigners.

If I'm wrong and the two girls you're talking about are not WAMW, then ignore my rant. I know this is off topic for this site, but I thought my experience could help you."
posted at 00:14:56 on October 22, 2012 by ette


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"If, through our unrighteous choices, we have lost our footing on that path, we must remember the agency we were given, agency we may choose to exercise again. I speak especially to those overcome by the thick darkness of addiction. If you have fallen into destructive, addictive behaviors, you may feel that you are spiritually in a black hole. As with the real black holes in space, it may seem all but impossible for light to penetrate to where you are. How do you escape? I testify the only way is through the very agency you exercised so valiantly in your premortal life, the agency that the adversary cannot take away without your yielding it to him. "

— Robert D. Hales

General Conference, April 2006