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Well... Here I am
By jja1234
6/5/2012 12:23:49 AM
I'm back. And I must say I'm better than ever. I recently read a post (I wish I could find it again so I could quote it and repost it) That basically said the person made the DECISION to end their addiction. At first when I was reading it I said to myself "I've decided multiple times to stop my addiction and here I sit still addicted..." Then I kept reading. That person said the same thing, that they had "decided" to quit but somewhere in the back of their mind they kept a little idea that somehow someway they would start again. Thats when it hit me... that is what I was doing. When I decided to stop again and change I would always think to myself that I'd miss it and would find a way back...

So what did I do? I made my decision. I've now decided that I AM going to serve an honorable full time mission. I made my decision that I AM going to stop my unworthy behavior. I made my decision to do whatever it takes to get my priesthood authority back only this time worthily! (just to clarify I never lost or was revoked of the priesthood, I feel i've never really had it because i've been unworthy since the age of 12) Any way as you can see its all about your thought. Sure I'm only on day 11.. But look where I'm at, I've gone from MB 2-3 times a day and pornography to 11 days of sobriety! I've met with my bishop 2 times in the past 2 weeks and he told me he can see the difference in my eyes. I feel like i'm reaching the top of the mountain, the light at the end of the tunnel. However you want to put it...

Just to fill you in and make it simple i'm on day 11 of recovery... While I realize that I will never be free from temptation I am now free from addiction. I have almost no desire to look anything up on the internet... And almost no desire to MB. I feel great! And my bishop told me that this week I will be able to take the sacrament for the first time since december. You will not believe how happy that makes me. I also get to receive my patriarchal blessing as soon as I make the phone call to my stake patriarch.

To anyone that reads this. There is hope. I know we all get caught up with our own problems. I've been there. I know you might feel like you have no hope and you'll never stop, whatever your addiction is. But I can personally tell you that with the help of our Wonderful Father in Heaven and his Son Jesus Christ, that Fantastic things are possible! I've never had such a great testimony of prayer and the help I receive.

The church is true brothers and sisters. I've seen it in my own life and in the lives of others. I know that our father in heaven answers prayers and wants all of us to be happy.

Amen!!!!!

Comments:

you can still do it    
"don't let one slip up now forget what you said here. I let me sobriety get the best of me and haven't gotten up since. Fight it, you an feel like you did here again."
posted at 02:53:56 on June 9, 2012 by moronidenovo


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"Each one who resolves to climb that steep road to recovery must gird up for the fight of a lifetime. But a lifetime is a prize well worth the price. This challenge uniquely involves the will, and the will can prevail. Healing doesn’t come after the first dose of any medicine. So the prescription must be followed firmly, bearing in mind that it often takes as long to recover as it did to become ill. But if made consistently and persistently, correct choices can cure. "

— Russell M. Nelson

General Conference, October 1988