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Why do we write here?
By moronidenovo
4/12/2012 7:46:08 PM
Im just wondering why we write here on LDSAR. Most will probably say it is a form of therapy and helps s express ourselves. But, in the end, are we helped much at all. I know everyone on this site means well, but I've seen a trend, where people feel so high and happy but then they crash. It happens over and over with everyone, including myself. Some of you guys have great advice, but some of us can't fully comprehend the advice, or just aren't fully ready for it or it simply doesn't apply. Another sad thing is a lot of us stop coming on the site, so books are left unfinished with the rest if us yearning for a success story. I hope I dont offend anyone.

Your thoughts?

Comments:

as for me...    
"I am doing my best to keep my mind in the present, and avoid pitfalls. I have had some slips from time to time and rather than "crash" and be upset with myself, I am gentle with myself. I use it as a learning experience and am working my program to better myself and make my weaknesses into strengths. I can do this. The success story I see will be my own."
posted at 23:40:15 on April 12, 2012 by Anonymous
Every day with using is a success story    
"I think that there are a few purposes for this forum. 1st of all it is therapeutic. 2nd, it is to remind us that we are not alone in our struggles. 3rd, to give each other support & advice. Everyone in the world has ups & downs. We, recovering addicts may just have more extreme ups & downs.
When it comes to success stories, every day that one of us goes without "slipping up" or without completely relapsing is a successful day.
I have gone through several months without relapse or slip ups. That is success. My addictions began over 30 years ago. It took me 30 years to get to where I am today, complete success & abstinence may take just as long. My negative thinking patterns are engrained into my mind, so to change them will take a while. My Bishop just told me today that while I might not see improvement in myself, he sees great improvement & that I am a lot healthier than I have been in years. Isn't that success? I'm not trying to be critical. But maybe we should look at success a little differently. If we are successful over the small private battles in our hearts & minds, then that is all that really matters. God doesn't care so much as where we have been as he does about where we are will to go with His help. Remember that the worth of ONE soul is great in sight of God. So if ONE of us has a good day, a good week, a good month, a good year. If even just ONE of us becomes temple worthy, if one of our marriages is saved, if one of us stops our self destructive behavior, then that is success."
posted at 01:54:30 on April 13, 2012 by ME
To keep things in perspective.    
"That's why I do. Because I need hope. And this site keeps my addiction recovery focused on Christ. That's why I go to meetings too. Because I can log on here even when I feel low and be reminded of Christ. I can keep things in perspective.

To me, this isn't my playbook. Yes, I come for advice and stuff. But I come to be reminded of Christ. Because that is what this is all about. This is us ministering to each other. This is us preaching as Paul did in the Bible. Preaching about how he "dies daily" and is born again through Christ. Preaching about how he changed from Saul to Paul. This for me is about us dying daily and being born again through Christ.

I continue to come on the site for exactly that reason. To try to encourage my peers through their recovery. I don't want my struggle to go to waste. I want you all to know that Jesus Christ is my Savior. And He can be your Savior too if you accept Him.

He wants you."
posted at 02:22:51 on April 13, 2012 by iamstrong
hope and share    
"For me it is to connect in one form, to be able to share my feeling, experience and to progress.
And of course to learn from others.

I live very far away and within the LDS there is no official addict and program.
To be able to connect with other lds it is a great blessing."
posted at 02:29:27 on April 13, 2012 by mike81
:)    
"@anon I agree, its great to see other people's work and opinion. I dont think I can call myself a success story yet, I have a long road ahead.

@ME Im not quite sure what you mean by therapeutic? Its a great way to make us see that we're not alone. That's huge, it helped me alot because I felt like scum because I thought all other Mormons were perfect. It just helps to know your not alone. Your not critical at all. I just sometimes yet discouraged when I see a lot of these people, battle this their whole life. No offense to you, but is that what I have to look forward to? Is that what all the newcomers think it will be like for them? So sometimes it can get a little scary. But the worst things i think happen is, when somebody just disappears. It would mean so much if people kept writing about how they're doing but i realize that not everyone wants to do that.

@IAmStrong there definitely is the spiritual perspective. perspective remind us of Christ. That's all true I think.

@mike81 Well I can somewhat relate to that. I dont live around a heavily LDS populated area so there isn't that co stant support. But that's great that the internet can do that for you.


-I guess to expand on my original post, I just feel like a lot of times people use this site to vent like they would on Facebook so they're not really looking for others opinions. And if that helps the person that's fine, but some of us write to help but get no reply whatsoever and its almost did I waste my time? So I just hope people can at least repley for the time given.

Another thing is, is some of the advice beyond what most of us can comprehend? Someone like me who is young might not understand the wisdom of an older individual. So I think if maybe we sowmtimes write as if we are in the place of the individual it would help. I hope I kinda made that clearer. Thanks."
posted at 00:10:35 on April 16, 2012 by moronidenovo
A Mini ARP Meeting    
"If you're worried that we're falling back on here, I would say that your concern lies with the nature of addiction, and not with the nature of this community. I haven't been around for very long on here, but I have been uplifted by the people I interact with. If I have a bad day, I can write about it and have people lift me up. If I have something exciting to tell people about, people can help me remember my successes when I check back later. I find this to be a help in a similar way to going to meetings. I don't think that simply going to meetings is going to destroy your addiction, but it helps you keep your head while you go about this very personal battle. I just appreciate the community and fellowship here. It helps me stay positive.

D&C 81:5 "Wherefore, be faithful; stand in the office which I have appointed unto you; succor the weak, lift up the hands which hang down, and strengthen the dfeeble knees.""
posted at 17:30:46 on April 16, 2012 by Fatherofone
Additional Support    
"I agree with those that have posted here. I have been going to a local PASG Recovery meeting since early last year and this site seems to be a good supplement to that or a fill-in for that for those that do not have a local meeting to go to. It is important for us to know that we are not alone and that there is hope, through Christ for us. Some General Conference talks that have really inspired and helped me are:

"Adversity" - President Eyring (April 2009)

"Point of Safe Return" - President Uchtdorf (April 2007)
"Broken Things to Mend" - Elder Holland (April 2006)
"Slow to Anger" - President Hinckley (October 2007)
"Looking Back and Moving Forward" - President Monson (April 2008)

May God be with you all. He loves us and wants to help us, if we will but reach out to him and surrender our lives and our hearts to him. Live today as if today was the only day of your accountability. We can do a day! :-)"
posted at 14:03:22 on April 17, 2012 by CarpeDiem
Additional Support    
"I agree with those that have posted here. I have been going to a local PASG Recovery meeting since early last year and this site seems to be a good supplement to that or a fill-in for that for those that do not have a local meeting to go to. It is important for us to know that we are not alone and that there is hope, through Christ for us. Some General Conference talks that have really inspired and helped me are:

"Adversity" - President Eyring (April 2009)

"Point of Safe Return" - President Uchtdorf (April 2007)
"Broken Things to Mend" - Elder Holland (April 2006)
"Slow to Anger" - President Hinckley (October 2007)
"Looking Back and Moving Forward" - President Monson (April 2008)

May God be with you all. He loves us and wants to help us, if we will but reach out to him and surrender our lives and our hearts to him. Live today as if today was the only day of your accountability. We can do a day! :-)"
posted at 17:58:30 on April 17, 2012 by CarpeDiem
LIstening    
"Sometimes the best help in the world doesnt come from someone that knows a lot about the subject because they are book smart. They are the people that LIVE it. If people can't say that they have really "been there" but are offering you help and advice- that gets hard to take sometimes. Having people that deal with it as an addict or as a loved one as an addict is easier to swallow. They "get it"
Sometimes I get discouraged when I see how many people are effected by this kind of garbage. Or you see more negative in the help you are getting. Like having everyone relapse or stories left untold. I think that is satan trying to make you not focus on what a benefit sites like this are.
I truely hope that you can find what peace and help your looking for- even if its not through this site. Everyone on this site, in my opinion, only wants to help and lift one another. Best wishes,
Faith"
posted at 02:27:43 on April 18, 2012 by stoptheabuse
lots of reasons    
"I have been on this site for 5 or 6 months now. For me, one of the most important things was seeing realistically what this addiction does to people. I have a lot more sympathy for people that struggle with it. I know my experiences, but it helps to get perspective.

Because of my age and gender, I don't have the option of going to meetings. When I'm older I may though. From your comments, I could see it being a good experience for me.

This site helped me as it related to venting. Frankly, because of a bunch of reasons, I don't have any friends that I trust and can rely on that much. I was giving it all to my Bishop because I could trust him. The poor man was patient with me, but because of this site I was able to ease off bothering him.

Support has been critical for me. I have a sponser because of this site and that's helped so much . My bishop is to my knowledge not an addict. He also isn't a women."
posted at 06:46:15 on April 18, 2012 by anon16


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"You lived with your Heavenly Father in a premortal life. You were there with Him. Your spirit knows what it is like to live in celestial realms. You can never be truly happy in an uncelestial environment. You know too much. That is one of the reasons that for you, wickedness never can be happiness. What a great thing it is to decide once and for all early in life what you will do and what you will not do with regards to honesty, modesty, chastity, the Word of Wisdom, and temple marriage. "

— Larry W. Gibbons

General Conference October 2006