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Confession and remaing past
By mike81
3/29/2012 1:44:01 AM
hello everyone,

I feel I made such big progress since I started my recovery journey 15 months ago.
A few weeks ago I Shared my 4th step with my bishop and on Saturday I will do the same with my sponsor with more details.

I feel great but sometime old thought are coming, I feel I was not going into all details regarding my past sin, when I was talking with my bishop.

Especially events that occur 1 year ago, when I meet a woman and we had heavy petting and starting oral sex for a few minutes after what I went away.

Although I told my sponsor about that I did not mentioned to my bishop the oral sex I just explain in general why I did but not giving details.

Today I feel good but when the remembering of this past experience is coming I still have something wrong inside me.

Self forgiveness is also important and it is the last things I have difficult to forgive my self.

I hope you will understand and maybe you had the same feeling/experience

thanks

your friend from europe

Comments:

Mike    
"Thank you for being so kind and humble. You are very appreciated on this site."
posted at 01:58:46 on March 29, 2012 by Anonymous
A clear conscience is a wonderful thing    
"For me, if something bugs me I feel that is my conscience telling me I need to take care of it; whether it is an issue from the past that I still need to process or a confession that I need to make. Recently I had a minor relapse. I followed a link advertising a web site that I shouldn’t have. It wasn’t porn under the legal definition, but it was arousing and I did go looking for it. At first I wasn’t going to bother resetting my sobriety date or make a confession to my wife or bishop. I justified it because I wasn’t looking at any nudity, but I had told myself that my boundary was not going looking for anything enticing, because that was addictive behavior and has always led me into trouble. I eventually reset my sobriety date and talked to my wife. Soon after that I had a temple recommend interview and I brought my bishop up-to-date on my latest relapses. I haven’t really been working with this particular bishop, but he knows about my addiction. I really felt good and clean after that. It was worth it to me.

You’re a good man. I enjoy your posts. I admire your faithfulness out there somewhat on your own.

Your brother in Utah,
John"
posted at 12:59:04 on March 29, 2012 by justjohn
Thanks    
"thank you for your kind comment, I feel a bit stressed today and I wanted to share with you my feeling, I know I have much to work on, I learned to love my self in a better way, for over one year I lost my church privilege and it was a good things but I feel I have to do more, step by step, it is about to have my hands clean but also my heart pure again

You made my day, I sincerely love all of you

Your friend from Europe"
posted at 13:17:12 on March 29, 2012 by mike81


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"In recent years, as I have sung the hymns of the Atonement, it has been with an especially full heart—and also with full voice, when I can continue to sing—lines such as “How great thou art,” “I scarce can take it in,” “To rescue a soul so rebellious and proud as mine,” “I stand all amazed,” and “Oh, it is wonderful!”"

— Neal A. Maxwell

General Conference May 1987