Day 43 and progressing
By anon16
3/8/2012 9:33:10 PM
I'm actually doing pretty good. Most of the posts that arare posted here, are when people struggle. I'm no expectation to that.

Right now its day 43, and I'm getting to go to the temple next week, something I'm really happy about. Nervous, but happy. I'm also getting an endorsement, which is a big relief.

The biggest thing though, is I know I'm still not there completely. Day 43 is huge for me, before it was a weak 30. I want to keep going, and make it day 44, etc. I'm not relying on the right things though. But I'm making some progress. Understanding change of heart a little more.

I'm also trying to understand the atonement better. My Ward is doing scholarships for efy, and the price is 40 hours of service. I'm doing it for someone . Anonymously, and the person really doesn't like me. But, it will help me understand better.

I think the biggest thing is that I'm actually trying now. Still wanting to mess up, but I'm getting better at ignoring that, and undstanding wwhat is normal for me.


Beautiful mind    
"Your last sentence reminded me of the movie "A Beautiful Mind" with Russell Crowe. Have you seen it?

In the movie loosely based on the life of John Nash (the famous, brilliant economist), the main character develops paranoid schizophrenia and begins seeing and hearing people who don't really exist. Eventually, he overcomes by learning to ignore the people and by understanding what is normal. The problem never goes away, but he doesn't let that bother him.

In fact, in once scene, Nash yells at the people, "You're not real, go away, you're not real!" He knows he's sick, but fighting it this way only makes him look more crazy to everyone around him.

I think we are all like Nash in some ways, especially addicts. We have voices telling us to do things we know are not right, and we know they will hurt us. But we do it anyway. And if we kick and scream and fight, getting upset at ourselves for being sick, the problem tends to get worse. Instead, we can learn to acknowledge that the voices and temptations are there, and they may not go away completely, but temptations and voices don't make us a bad person. We can simply acknowledge them, and then ignore them.

Well done on day 43!!"
posted at 22:29:47 on March 8, 2012 by beclean
Great job.    
"Keep going :) Jesus Christ thinks you are worth the Garden and the Cross. I hope you realize that you are worth all of the temptation and trials as well. With Him, you can do this!"
posted at 23:24:58 on March 8, 2012 by iamstrong

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"The excuse is given that it is hard to avoid, that it is right at our fingertips and there is no escape. Suppose a storm is raging and the winds howl and the snow swirls about you. You find yourself unable to stop it. But you can dress properly and seek shelter, and the storm will have no effect upon you. Likewise, even though the Internet is saturated with material, you do not have to watch it. You can retreat to the shelter of the gospel and its teaching of cleanliness and virtue and purity of life. "

— Gordon B. Hinckley

General Conference, October 2004