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Feeling Friendless
By anon16
12/11/2011 5:32:48 PM
I had a girl in my ward, a few years younger then me who said once, "Well, you're everybody's friend." I really make an effort to be nice to everyone, even if I don't really like them. But they aren't my friend back, if that makes sense.

Everyone, it feels, has someone that they like better - and just tolerate me. It's selfish to want a really good friend, but I've never had one, a "best friend." I have a fairly good friend who I've known for 8 years, but she lives in a different state, and has for 4 years.

At girls camp, everyone generally sticks with people from their ward. There is one other girl in my year from my ward, at least up until this year, and we aren't friends.

This year I was the Mia Maid class president, and I made an effort towards 1 girl who moved in recently. I picked her up for activities, and occasionally church. We got along pretty well, and she has similar problems. However, she doesn't like church, and when she is 18, she's having her name removed. She isn't my friend. I did make an effort to be her friend, and to a degree we are - but not really good friends. There's a barrier - I want to be good, she doesn't.

Because I've been home schooled, I've never felt like I've fit in, and I don't have any school friends or what not. I'm not sure what I can do so this changes, I'm not sure if I can. I like to be a priority, and I know that is selfish, and I'm praying that I not have those feelings.

I just feel that people don't really like me, and aren't really my friends, and I'm not sure exactly if what I want is even out there. I'm scared that if/when I go to college it is going to be exactly like this. I feel like somedays my parents don't even like me.

I wanted to self medicate myself, but I didn't. I've been telling myself that "It isn't helping me reach my goals." But if I don't have friends, at college or whatnot, what is the point?

Comments:

Come to school with me!    
"Haha... But really haha. First off, I am so glad that when you are tempted that you think about your goals! You have such great goals! And you will reach them!

If having a close friend is this important to you then it is important to God. Pray. He cares. He wants you to be happy. Life is not only meant to be endured but enjoyed.

Another thing I have found is that in order to find a true friend you must make many friends. And that's what you've been doing. Make friends with everyone. Because even if most of them don't look at you as a friend, someone will come along and be a true friend. And that person will make all the others worth it.

And if you ever come to my school, you've got me and all my friends. No matter where you are, you've got me."
posted at 22:48:06 on December 11, 2011 by iamstrong
Was feeling sorry for myself    
"I was feeling sorry for myself yesterday, I think that's the best way to put it. I'd had some illusions shattered, as it related to the girl I mentioned above. Sometimes I get really depressed about "not having friends." and I was yesterday. Most of the time it doesn't trouble me as much - I don't let it. But yesterday I did, when I saw all the people at church who were friends, and the comment she made, and the boy she is friends with - who said the same thing. It discouraged me. She's not a good influence on me, and I think in some ways this is good.

And, thinking about my goals is the only way that I can make progress in this. I just hope that when I get a good distance away from mb and porn that it will not be an issue for me. I've never gone a full month, and it's stuck in my head that it's the magic number. I'm afraid to, because once I screw up then, it'll be a lot harder to go back.

And, yeah, that'd be awesome :)"
posted at 10:55:06 on December 12, 2011 by anon16
Keep an eternal perspective :)    
"Just remember,
- Joseph Smith did good by everyone around him, and was hated by many of them
- Abinadi tried to preach to people to save their souls, and was killed for his efforts
- Jesus did nothing but good to everyone, and was crucified by those He saved

Sometimes we don't get our rewards immediately, or even in this life,but they do come.

Don't let others make you feel like you have to be popular to be cool. My eternal companion and I were discusing this last night. There are many different types of cool. There's football star/cheerleader cool. Then there's straight A's,will-be-the-cheerleader's-boss cool. Then there's good-righteous-celestial-kingdom cool.

Hang in there, it gets better, my wife and I know from experience. :)"
posted at 12:53:28 on December 12, 2011 by Hk-47


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"My brethren who are caught in this addiction or troubled by this temptation, there is a way. Don’t accommodate any degree of temptation. Prevent sin and avoid having to deal with its inevitable destruction. So, turn it off! Look away! Avoid it at all costs. Direct your thoughts in wholesome paths. Please heed these warnings. Let us all improve our personal behavior and redouble our efforts to protect our loved ones and our environment from the onslaught of ography that threatens our spirituality, our marriages, and our children. "

— Dallin H. Oaks

General Conference, April 2005