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Just what I needed.
By PaulThomas
10/2/2011 2:50:24 AM
Way to go Jeffrey R. Holland, just what I needed! I've loved him for years, but I think he's my new favorite apostle, (should I have favorites?). His talk in Priesthood session was absolutley amazing, just said it like it is. And for the first time since I was 15, I made it through a Priesthood "grilling" without feeling guilty the whole time. I mean I'm obviously not perfect, and his whole talk still applied to me directly, but I didn't have that awful pit in my stomach that makes me feel like I'm going to be sick.

To be 100% honest after talking with my bishop I didn't feel THAT different, I didn't feel like a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders or that I was now super in-tune with the spirit, but during Holland's talk I kept expecting to feel the guilt and shame of knowing I was guilty of doing EXACTLY what he said not to do... but I didn't! And that's proof enough that I'm at least making progress.

This isn't the end, I know I'm still going to be tempted, I know that at least for now I am still addicted, but I'm making progress. I'm not white-knuckling it anymore, I have help and resources to turn to, and Holland's talk was a huge boost in moral for me. I realize that if I continue on the course I am on, I can actually complete the repentance process and be FORGIVEN. That seems so crazy to me. 2 months ago I thought I was doomed to live with the guilt for the rest of my life, I thought I would never have the courage to tell somebody about it, and 3 weeks after joining this site I've already made more progress than I have in 3 years of battling my addiction. (Thanks to you all)

For any guys who didn't watch it and for all of the women; get a copy of the talk. It will help and strengthen you immensely. I also like to see that in 1 day of conference the site got 20 new members, the prophets know what they're doing ;)

I've also been praying for years that I would have opportunities to do missionary work and exercise my priesthood to help others and I never really got anything. I realize now that it was because I was not worthy to exercise my priesthood, and not even really worthy to feel the promptings of the Holy Ghost. The week following my confession to the bishop, I had a friend from home ask me if I knew how to set up an appointment for the missionaries, and 2 days later one of the girls I home teach asked me for a blessing (I called the bishop to make sure I was worthy... he said yes! man that felt good) and I think I felt the spirit giving that blessing more strongly than I have ever felt it in my life. I was crying, and so was she. I am SO HAPPY! I want to share my happiness with all of you. Now I just need to stay focused, take it slow, and stay firm in my resolve. You guys are AWESOME. Thank you for your love, your support and your prayers. I pray for you too.

With love,
Paul

Comments:

Watching it now    
"Awesome!

http://lds.org/general-conference/watch/2011/10?lang=eng&vid=1192646403001

Please watch this and all priesthood talks"
posted at 08:28:08 on October 2, 2011 by Anonymous
just watched    
"Thank you for sharing, I needed this just as much as the priesthood brethren."
posted at 22:52:01 on October 2, 2011 by Anonymous
Exactly my thoughts!    
"Just what I was thinking man. Elder Holland's talk... Amazing. So powerful and so strengthening. Thanks for sharing your recent story with exercising your priesthood, giving your friend a blessing. You, are a great strength for me. Same situation I am in. Thanks so much for being a great example of strength and confidence for all of us!"
posted at 16:44:42 on October 5, 2011 by sinwithsatan
A way I can contact you?    
"Hey dude, I was just thinking. Anyway I could email you or somethin? Maybe text or some way we communicate a little easier and faster to help eachother out. Like you said, it seems we're both in the same situation. Preparing to go on a mission, both having a goal to overcome transgression and resist temptation... I know atleast for me, I need the extra help.. And I think talking to someone often who is in my same situation, at the same time, will help. I would greatly appreciate it man.. Thanks, and hope everythings goin well!"
posted at 16:57:22 on October 5, 2011 by sinwithsatan
Sure thing    
"My email is paultjenks@aol.com

email me whenever you want, I like the idea."
posted at 00:01:23 on October 6, 2011 by paulthomas


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