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i just don't know what i feel
By Teddy
8/10/2011 9:56:35 AM
i feel odd i don't feel right i know it has something to do with falling a few minutes ago i ruined it the only good thing i had i ruined my soberness. I went 7 weeks can you believe that and now i was back to 1 week but now I'm back to not even a day.I don't know whats wrong with me but i can't tell anybody i have to do this alone i have to at least get to 3 weeks that's all i need......i need prayer like always i need prayer. I felt the spirit and i actually fasted this sunday which i never do. I fasted so i can break my addiction and look what happens the first thing i do is fall it can't get any worse though right? although i'm kind of relieved i only did it once when i usually keep going and going since i already did it but i stopped. I'm going for 3 weeks just 3 weeks not even 3 i'm going for 1 i just need 1 week. Please pray please i need positive feedback even though i don't deserve it i'm feeling really bad. :((

Comments:

Hang in there...    
"I've been in this cycle of addiction for many years now, and I understand exactly how you are feeling. Keep going. You can do it!"
posted at 09:59:01 on August 10, 2011 by asdfjkl1234
CANT do this alone.....    
"I would look at the statement you made...."I can't tell anybody, I need to do this alone". The addiction is bigger that you are. I guarantee you CANT do this alone. Get into an accountability relationship with a trusted friend. Go to ARP or PASG meetings....see a therapist. See your Bishop. This addictions THRIVES in secret.
Lot's of wisdom and Love here Teddy...Open up your life. I picked up a slogan after reading "Every Man's Battle"....It is, "LIVE IN THE OPEN".

We are the front line foot soldiers of a war that is very win-able. Be patient. Work your plan. Immerse your mind in good and wholesome books. Read and study about your addiction. Don't fear it. Take care....I will pray for you!"
posted at 10:47:33 on August 10, 2011 by chefdalet
One day at a time...with help    
"Teddy,

You have my prayers. Step one...you are powerless. You can't do this...but God can. I can hear the wheels in your brain turning in this post and how frantic you are. You've got to slow down, in fact, it is time to BE STILL. Do not live for 3 weeks, or 1 week. One day at a time is all any of us can do. Just awake in the morning and commit to God to serve Him the best you can.

Do not focus on staying away from the addiction. Do not fill your mind with thoughts of avoidance. Focus on your Savior and fill your mind with His gospel. It seems like from a distance that they are the same thing, but they are not. One is playing a purely 'defensive' game and that will not help you win. You've got to make this an 'offensive' game and that means getting OFF the field and letting the Savior step on. He'll beat the living crap out of the enemy...I promise.

Also, the very definition of addiction is something you cannot stop on your own. God meant for you to lean on Him and on others. Get the help you deserve. Step by step this addiction will loose it's grasp on you. Do not loose hope."
posted at 14:23:26 on August 10, 2011 by maddy
You can do this    
"Teddy,
You can do this! However, I agree with the others, you can't do this alone. If you could, you would be sober now. Step one is about admitting you can't do this on your own. Being honest with others is the most freeing thing. I love my ARP meetings, counselors, bishop, and friends for that (and other things too). I couldn't do this without help from God and support from others. If I make it through today I'll be back at three weeks, but I'm struggling big time. I'm thankful for all the people I can share that with. Just sharing it seems to take some of the power out of the struggle. Plus I know people are praying for me. I'm going to get through today, and so can you. Hang in there and keep trying. You can do it. You have done it and can do it again. We love you and God loves you, and there are people in your life that love you and want to support you if you'll let them.
D"
posted at 09:40:55 on August 11, 2011 by dstanley
You helped me tonight    
"Teddy,
I am so glad you helped me tonight, I tripped onto a seductive site, luckily after exploring, it was less of a trap, and I came over here as a coping skill. Your comment you left is making it easier for me to not lose my footing completely. Stay strong and we will progress closer and closer to the happiness and confidence everyday.

Keeping you in my prayers.

Josh"
posted at 23:41:18 on August 11, 2011 by soberfocus
Thanks all    
"For your prayers and kind words.....thanks Josh for saying that I helped you reading that put a big smile on my face :) another thing to smile about is that tomorrow I will be sober for 1 week :)))))) !!! No doubt in my mind I couldn't of done it without you guys!! Thanks again."
posted at 20:57:26 on August 17, 2011 by Teddy
Way to go Teddy!    
"You won't regret your commitment. We are here for you."
posted at 21:05:09 on August 17, 2011 by chefdalet


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"Now brethren, the time has come for any one of us who is so involved to pull himself out of the mire, to stand above this evil thing, to “look to God and live” (Alma 37:47). We do not have to view salacious magazines. We do not have to read books laden with smut. We do not have to watch television that is beneath wholesome standards. We do not have to rent movies that depict that which is filthy. We do not have to sit at the computer and play with ographic material found on the Internet."

— Gordon B. Hinckley

General Conference, October 2004