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First Step to Ending my Adderall Addiction
By Dog Mama
8/1/2011 9:56:23 PM
I'm not sure if my addiction really is a problem or not, or if I truly have an addiction. About seven years ago when I went back to school to earn my master's degree in Special Education I started taking Ritalin and then later Adderall to help with ADHD and studying. I feel in LOVE with the drug! At times I would take extra pills so that I could stay up for a day or days to get work completed. At first it was a miracle drug, and it was WONDERFUL.

About three years ago I noticed that it was becoming a problem. I was taking more and more and becoming very suicidal. I checked myself into a rehab and got off the drug, difficult withdrawal....but that didn't last long.

Since then I've tried on my own to kick the habit, with little or no luck. I was once again in the hospital this past Spring, and went through withdrawal and was off for about a month. I know that it's a problem, and I think that it impacts my life, but I'm not 100% certain how much. My best friend is about the only one who knows how bad the problem has been...I don't know if others even notice.

I've spoken with my bishop and told him a little of the problem, but not to the full extent how bad it's been. I asked for a referral to see a therapist with LDS Social Services, and I plan to attend my first support meeting tomorrow night.

I know that my health has been at risk....a mini stroke at Christmas and two heart attack scares in the past 12 months.....I don't know.....maybe it's a problem, maybe not. The many thoughts of suicide probably isn't good. Lately, I've been thinking more and more about trying meth, my fear is that I would like it too much and never give it up.

Comments:

12 step program    
"I say start working the 12 steps to recovery and beleive in the mirale of the atonement. That has been my lifeline latelyand it seems to be working

Joahua"
posted at 22:15:22 on August 1, 2011 by Anonymous
Thank you    
"Thank you for the advice :-). I will work the program."
posted at 22:21:45 on August 1, 2011 by Dog Mama
Definitely a problem    
"From what you've described, it sounds to me like it's definitely a problem and definitely an addiction. I agree, start working the steps and attending ARP meetings."
posted at 22:30:21 on August 1, 2011 by dstanley
Dogmama,    
"Your post made me smile. Not because I'm amused by your pain but because, only an addict would wonder if they actually have an addiction, even AFTER being hospitalized and going to rehab. : ) Yes, you probably belong with us. And we are happy to have you. You don't need to feel this way anymore. There is a solution. Addiction to speed (in ALL its forms) is completely treatable."
posted at 22:48:46 on August 1, 2011 by Anonymous
Welcome    
"I agree with anon. Welcome. It sounds like you are on a road of discovery leading towards recovery. Prescription drug abuse is a big problem in the world today and you are not alone and it is not too big for the Savior to overcome. Work the 12 steps and they will start working you. Again, Welcome."
posted at 11:10:55 on August 2, 2011 by maddy


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" Is it possible to reclaim a life that through reckless abandon has become so strewn with garbage that it appears that the person is unforgivable? Or what about the one who is making an honest effort but has fallen back into sin so many times that he feels that there is no possible way to break the seemingly endless pattern? Or what about the person who has changed his life but just can't forgive himself?The Atonement of Jesus Christ is available to each of us. His Atonement is infinite. It applies to everyone, even you. It can clean, reclaim, and sanctify even you. That is what infinite means—total, complete, all, forever. "

— Shayne M. Bowen

General Conference October 2006