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I WENT TO MY FIRST MEETING!
By momof5
7/6/2011 9:18:18 AM
I went to my first meeting it was amazing! I felt the spirit so strong and I felt heavenly fathers love for me. So I have started to detach from my husband so that I can work on myself and fix my anger and bitterness to him. This week he left three times and stayed at hotel rooms. So we made a deal he can come back if he will work on him and his recovery. He said he will work on the workbook, he will not go to the meetings he does not need them. By the way he doesn't ever touch his workbook. So I told him I will not give him myself right now. I need to work on me. I know that sounds selfish but I told him we need to start over as friends and go from there. He told me last night that if this is how the relationship is going to be then he is going to get out and leave. I know it is sad but I am at a point that if he decides that then there is nothing I can do. But I need to get in a good place, I need to get to a place of forgiveness, peace, and love. I have so much anger about this situation and I feel so sad for my kids because they didn't choose this. The only thing I can control is me. I choose to feel the spirit and to love my heavenly father with every thing I have he is the only one I can trust. I don't know if I will ever trust my husband. Wives I hope your situation is going better than mine. Even if my husband has given up the porn the selfishness is still there. I want a man who loves heavenly father so much he would do anything to keep his family. I just don't know if my family will stay together:(

Comments:

HUGS and PRAYERS    
"I'd rather not comment about comparison of progress, but I just wanted to give you some prayers and hugs. This fallout after finding out about an addiction (especially to porn, IMHO) is so severe and hurtful. Just as some addicts have said on here, I believe us affected need to also "surrender" to the Lord. And surrendering can be so scary and difficult. But, there is joy somewhere in it in the end. I'm still testing that out..."
posted at 09:27:48 on July 6, 2011 by ConfidenceIn
Good job, Momof5,    
"That sounds like good boundaries to me! I think you handled it great. And great job in getting to the meeting!! Your attitude and perspective are right where they should be, in my opinion. I'm sending you my love and strength to continue in recovery and to stand your ground."
posted at 09:52:25 on July 6, 2011 by Anonymous


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"Lucifer will do all in his power to keep you captive. You are familiar with his strategy. He whispers: “No one will ever know.” “Just one more time.” “You can’t change; you have tried before and failed.” “It’s too late; you’ve gone too far.” Don’t let him discourage you. When you take the path that climbs, that harder path of the Savior, there are rewards along the way. When you do something right, when you resist temptation, when you meet a goal, you will feel very good about it. It is a very different kind of feeling than you have when you violate commandments—an altogether different feeling. It brings a measure of peace and comfort and provides encouragement to press on. "

— Richard G. Scott

General Conference May 1990