By momof5
7/6/2011 9:18:18 AM
I went to my first meeting it was amazing! I felt the spirit so strong and I felt heavenly fathers love for me. So I have started to detach from my husband so that I can work on myself and fix my anger and bitterness to him. This week he left three times and stayed at hotel rooms. So we made a deal he can come back if he will work on him and his recovery. He said he will work on the workbook, he will not go to the meetings he does not need them. By the way he doesn't ever touch his workbook. So I told him I will not give him myself right now. I need to work on me. I know that sounds selfish but I told him we need to start over as friends and go from there. He told me last night that if this is how the relationship is going to be then he is going to get out and leave. I know it is sad but I am at a point that if he decides that then there is nothing I can do. But I need to get in a good place, I need to get to a place of forgiveness, peace, and love. I have so much anger about this situation and I feel so sad for my kids because they didn't choose this. The only thing I can control is me. I choose to feel the spirit and to love my heavenly father with every thing I have he is the only one I can trust. I don't know if I will ever trust my husband. Wives I hope your situation is going better than mine. Even if my husband has given up the porn the selfishness is still there. I want a man who loves heavenly father so much he would do anything to keep his family. I just don't know if my family will stay together:(


"I'd rather not comment about comparison of progress, but I just wanted to give you some prayers and hugs. This fallout after finding out about an addiction (especially to porn, IMHO) is so severe and hurtful. Just as some addicts have said on here, I believe us affected need to also "surrender" to the Lord. And surrendering can be so scary and difficult. But, there is joy somewhere in it in the end. I'm still testing that out..."
posted at 09:27:48 on July 6, 2011 by ConfidenceIn
Good job, Momof5,    
"That sounds like good boundaries to me! I think you handled it great. And great job in getting to the meeting!! Your attitude and perspective are right where they should be, in my opinion. I'm sending you my love and strength to continue in recovery and to stand your ground."
posted at 09:52:25 on July 6, 2011 by Anonymous

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"I will speak briefly of the principle of repentance. How grateful I am for the understanding we have of this great principle. It is not a harsh principle, as I thought when I was a boy. It is kind and merciful. The Hebrew root of the word means, simply, "to turn," or to return, to God. Jehovah pled with the children of Israel: "Return . . . and I will not cause mine anger to fall upon you: for I am merciful . . . and I will not keep anger for ever. Only acknowledge thine iniquity, that thou hast transgressed against the Lord thy God." When we acknowledge our sins, confess them and forsake them, and turn to God, He will forgive us."

— Richard G. Hinckley

General Conference April 2006