BIG QUESTION i need an answer!!!
By Teddy
7/3/2011 4:56:11 PM
I don't know if this is appropriate but i need an answer..... I've been trying so hard to be sober and i finally reached 2 weeks and 2 days i was so happy but sadly today i saw something in a magazine it was a girl in a bikini and i stared at it for a while i got excited but i didn't do anything i swear i just left to the bathroom to pee i was so happy that i didnt fall then i found a little bit of s***m (just a little) on my you know what i was so heartbroken i need to know if it's counted as falling please answer im so SAD :(


Your 15 dude    
"You're engine is on over drive. Discharge is probably gonna be on your you know what regardless of what you're up too. I think you need to cool out a little and don't be so sad mate. I was 20 years old before I went more then 9 days and even then I only went 11. Know that lust is road you can't go down because you know where it leads and recognize you lusted and chalk it up for what it was - you stared at a picture and lusted and then stopped before it lead to masturbation. Did you fall with looking at porn? No. Did you fall with masturbation? No. Did you to lust? Sounds like it. Did you fantasize? I'd bet you did a little. Maybe not. I think 2 weeks for a 15 year old is great. Look at the positive brah! You have went 2 weeks son! Bam!

In my experience I've never found peace or relent with the obsession till I quite white knuckling it and surrender. I just posted a little about surrender in my "The Third Option" post. Maybe it can help you get further, much further, then 2 weeks with a good measure of peace. I'm counting on it. Good luck man, and again don't be hard on yourself. Not because you deserve to be treated better but because it will help you stay sober, which is what you want."
posted at 21:19:02 on July 3, 2011 by they speak
Right on They Speak    
"I only wish that I had a dad that explained how the human body develops. Elder Boyd K. Packer and Pres. Hinckley have talked about this this very thing. The body has a way of discharging excess semen via a process known as nocturnal emissions or wet dreams. These are normal and occur frequently. What our brain does is During the sleep cycle a healthy male, regardless of age will have an erection once every 90 minutes. A wet dream will only occur during this phase of the sleep cycle. It is also at this time the REM sleep occurs, that is Rapid Eye Movement which simple means that you are dreaming - and if you are a normal boy/guy this dream playing out in your brain combines with the seminal vesicles and says, ok boys, the pipeline is open- out you go!!!!! That means you change your underwear and your sheets.
The danger of viewing porn and masturbating is that you mess the wiring up in your brain. You are training your brain to be stimulated by fantasy and you loose virtue. You then start having sex dreams all the time and your body starts going into overdrive to the extreme. One addict that I know told me that he had a 4X a day habit. This poor soul did not know how to have a meaningful relationship with a woman. His brain had been rewired through his addiction.
The male seed (sperm) is Sacred. No one on this site has ever said that before. For you to waste it or like the Bible say's "spill it out on the ground" is sin. The Lord slew Onan, the son of Judah for spilling his seed on the ground. Spilling you seed out to satisfy an urge because of Porn is therefore a very grievous sin. Elder Bruce R. McKonkie referred to it as Onanism. Nocturnal Emissions are not willful acts and not related to masturbation.

I hope that I haven't confused you. Let me know what you think."
posted at 23:31:07 on July 3, 2011 by 3R's
Any one else have some advise for Teddy    
"Know of any good and spiritually correct books on human sexual development?"
posted at 23:32:28 on July 3, 2011 by 3R's
Sex men and God    
"D. Weiss"
posted at 01:11:02 on July 4, 2011 by Anonymous
"@THEY SPEAK thanks bro you don't know how good that made me feel!! oh and for some reason i can't find that post maybe you can put a link?

@3R'S no i understand it makes perfect sense i mean i knew about some of that but i didn't know MB messes up all that like your brain wiring thanks for that that was really helpful.What scripture is that the about Onan?

Thanks for the info about the book."
posted at 18:51:42 on July 4, 2011 by Teddy
The sin of Onan    
"Gen. 38:4, 8-9. In those days it was customary that if a man espoused to a wife had died having no children, then his brother would marry her and raise up "seed" offspring in his brothers name. There are two meanings to the word seed - one refers to offspring and the other refers to sperm. Onan was commanded to "go into his deceased brothers wife in order to raise up children in his name. Onan practiced what is called withdrawal so as to prevent conception. This was evil in the sight of the Lord and so the Lord slew Onan.

I know that there are several issues that have been compounded into one here but my point is that OUR SEED IS SACRED! To masturbate and spill our seed in such a manner is even more serious that what poor Onan did. The "M" word is spoken often here. Climax or Self produced Orgasm is "spilling our procreative seed" down the drain. For me at least, knowing this has been very powerful in my recovery from P.A.S.A."
posted at 22:48:00 on July 4, 2011 by 3R's
You're a guy    
"Obviously. Sometimes you cant control simple bodily functions. Most of the time. You had to pee.. do you feel bad about that? I wouldn't worry about it. About the magazine, you can't stop a bird from landing on your head, but you can stop it from building a nest. If you are reading a magazine, and that picture comes up, you can't help it. You just have to accept that it's there and move on. The worst thing you can do is allow yourself to indulge and imagine bad things. You have to just move on. Sing a hymn. Pray."
posted at 15:33:52 on July 10, 2011 by SeminaryKid
"I have to disagree a bit on Seminarykid's post. While the general idea is correct, YOU CAN HELP what you look at or read. You make the choice to look or read, and then you make the addict choice (along w/ the chemical addiction problem) to indulge in bad thoughts. So, it really starts with looking or reading (in this case) to begin with. Pray that you can overcome the temptation to read such things that can have photos of a girl in a bikini to begin with."
posted at 17:47:51 on July 10, 2011 by confidenceIn
"There will be times when you are innocently exposed to something unsavory. Seminary kid was exactly right. We don't stop reading or looking at EVERYTHING. It is like he said, what we do with that initial thought. That is what makes us different than other people. We don't have perfect control of what pops in our head. It is what we act on it that counts."
posted at 22:08:01 on July 10, 2011 by Anonymous
I think...    
"it goes back to being in the world but not of it. I know this is where I screwed up initially and now about 15years later I am addicted to porn. I saw what u did (very immodest clothing)except it was on a schoolmate and I didn't say to myself that was nice(as I don't think u can turn off ur hormones) and moved on with my thoughts I said that was nice and dwelt on it then masterbated then that became habitual for me dwelling on those kind of thoughts and acting out and it just got worse and worse as for me to get the same high I "needed" actualing wanted something more hardcore and that eventually led to porn. So insummary u can in the world but not of it"
posted at 23:47:41 on July 10, 2011 by Joshua
More clarification...    
"Latest anon:
Well, yes, you can't "stop reading or looking at EVERYTHING." That is a no-brainer. The key here, is what you knowingly allow to come to you. If you are subscribed to say, Sports Illustrated; knowing that there will probably be girls with bikinis in it, then there is a problem. That is the point I was trying to make. One can make plenty of good choices to be in the world, and not of it.
*My password wasn't working for my original user name, but this is still me, ConfidenceIn. ;0)"
posted at 07:23:17 on July 11, 2011 by Confidence
A good book    
"Read "Every Young Man's Battle.....". It will give you some valuable insight."
posted at 11:01:58 on July 11, 2011 by chefdalet

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"Now, my brothers and sisters, let not Jesus’ redemption for us stop at the immortalizing dimension of the Atonement, “the loosing of the bands of death”. Let us grasp the proffered gift of eternal life! We will end up either choosing Christ’s manner of living or His manner of suffering! It is either “suffer even as I”, or overcome “even as [He] … overcame”. His beckoning command is to become “even as I am”. The spiritually settled accept that invitation, and “through the atonement of Christ,” they become and overcome! "

— Neal A. Maxwell

General Conference May 1987