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Everything?!!!
By gracefull
6/15/2011 1:45:01 AM
I saw this on someone's facebook profile and thought it was funny, but so true

"Mormons don't participate in lent b/c being Mormon is like lent 24/7. Only thing left to give up is dessert. NO ONE'S TAKING THAT FROM ME."

the only difference for me was that in addition to dessert, porn was my favorite pet sin.

I justified that I had given up everything else for God.. and that throughout my life I had sacrificed soo much for him.. and had been ridiculed for those sacrifices by teenage 'friends' and 'friends' at church schools,etc..... .. and that in my 'addict' mind... I wasn't really hurting anyone except for myself... I was trapped, lonely, afraid, and in a dark place all because I couldn't totally let go of the idea that my life (as lonely/frustrating) as it was could be less lonely/frustrating without porn.

so...one lonely dark night, I said to God.. in tears... you can have it.. you can have all the little sins that the world thinks are so small... I'll give it all up... if I can just have a solid relationship with you..and feel at peace in my life.

Wow.. that took sooooo much for me to say... it wasn't about courage at all.. it was just total surrender... giving up... any chance at a 'worldlly life' but I was willing, the pain was just so old and predictable... I knew deep deep down that I had had enough... I was truly willing to bet the rest of my life on him, or at the very least experiment on it.... not for some bishop, or for a girl or for anything.. just because I needed to be happy and I was sick and tired of being sick and tired.

then funny things started happening... the windows of heaven started opening... a recruiter called, I found a new job... I felt like I finally tuned into the GOD channel on my radio and was able to hear answers to prayers... my elders quorum president (who wasn't really a friend) befriended me, I found newfound energy/insights related to health/fitness, I developed new friendships, etc..etc..etc... and they continue!

In summary... God has really come through for me! and he deserves credit!

Only God/jesus christ I think, really understand the heart of an addict....(at least my heart) most people tick me off thinking they can understand me... and summarily provide advice on my life... God/Jesus Christ were definitely were the only ones to understand how much of a sacrifice it took for a lonely guy to sacrifice his trusty/tried connection of 15+ yrs. "you can take my fake idols.... I want the real thing... and I'm ready to make covenants/commitments to prove it!

I've got so much that God is working with me on... right now (how to be a missionary, stop the cussing, reading scriptures better, and generally how to be a better man)


--- none of this requires a response, I'm not trying to sell anything, I'm just posting for my own benefit----

Comments:

Way to Go!    
"Good stuff."
posted at 02:39:26 on June 15, 2011 by dstanley
Amazing good story!    
"Thank you for sharing..."
posted at 15:15:18 on June 15, 2011 by hero


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" Is it possible to reclaim a life that through reckless abandon has become so strewn with garbage that it appears that the person is unforgivable? Or what about the one who is making an honest effort but has fallen back into sin so many times that he feels that there is no possible way to break the seemingly endless pattern? Or what about the person who has changed his life but just can't forgive himself?The Atonement of Jesus Christ is available to each of us. His Atonement is infinite. It applies to everyone, even you. It can clean, reclaim, and sanctify even you. That is what infinite means—total, complete, all, forever. "

— Shayne M. Bowen

General Conference October 2006