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Practical Resources Please!
By dearbrother
6/11/2011 11:05:25 AM
I have had a lot of different advice on overcoming pornography, but what books, videos, websites, organizations, etc. have helped you the most? Is there a filter or something that you recommend? Your help is appreciated.

Your Brother

Comments:

My .02    
"I think that the best organizations to seek help from are LDS family services with a good therapist, and an ARP group, and of course your bishop or stake president.

Books, "He Restoreth My Soul" as a good place to start.

We use NetNanny at our house for filtering."
posted at 15:12:54 on June 11, 2011 by maddy
what I do    
"+1 on the "He Restoreth my soul".. For me.. step one was to recognize that it's impossible to fix this by myself. Everyone on this board will attest this fact. this addiction, like all addictions is powerful, baffling and cunning. You might think you are special and have the will power to do it.. good luck! This is insanity and brain damage. :-)

Find a small group of people that you can trust with your problem. Getting the problem in the light is hugely important. I use my father, my bishop, my therapist, a sponsor, a close friend. they have to be coached on how to help you and how to be brutally honest with you.

I attend SAA 12 step program since the closest LDS ARP group is a long ways away. I didnt want to go to a 12 tep program at first. I thought it was for the people living under the bridge. It's not. It's scary at first and scary to share. As you do this, you will find brotherhood to support you in your ups and slips. You will hear stories from people that used the same justifications you have used in the past to fuel your addiction. This is useful too. The LDS ARP program doesn't use sponsors but the SAA program does.

Ultimately sex addiction is usually an intimacy disorder. A therapist can help you with this. If the cost is too high, there are workbooks available. Recoverynation.com has a free workbook. I personally use the facing the shadow workbook from patrick carnes. The "thinking work" in the workbooks help you to examine your life to find out what fear you are self medicating.

Sorry if that sounds like a lot of stuff and work. It is but for me it's worth it. I desparately want my free agency back. :-("
posted at 15:49:04 on June 11, 2011 by Hurtallover
Practical stuff    
"He Did Deliver Me From Bondage & related phamplets they have
WillPower is not Enough
DVD called Toxic Shame - By John Bradshaw
Book of Mormon
Think and Grow rich (the sex chapter)
AMCAP (association for mormon counselors and psychologists) had some CD's I bought there were very helpful.
For me, GROUP (SA, LDS 12 step, any group of people that are honest with each other actually) has been the most impactful.. seriously if you have not been to one.. and it takes 2 hours to drive there.. do it... tell your story.. be ruthless about the truth of it... and it's almost guaranteed to be the most effective thing you can do.


I'm working on customaffirmations right now...
http://www.tonylitster.com/customaffirmations.html />
just start taking action... any action.. God can steer a moving car.. much better than a parked one!"
Covenant eyes    
"Is great!!! Provides accountability report on internet activities.
All the ressources from the church mentionned above
Dr. Doug Weiss stuff is also good at sexaddict.com"
posted at 22:29:36 on June 11, 2011 by Anonymous
My suggestions    
"The things listed above are all great. I go to counseling (with a sex addiction counselor and a counselor to deal with my depression), I'm doing LifeStar, ARP, I've read a lot of good church books (right now I'm reading Clean Hands, Pure Heart), I use Covenant Eyes (they have accountability and filtering now), Patrick Carnes has lots of good books, keeping up on my spirituality, and self care (sleeping, eating, etc.). It's lots of hard work, but it's worth it."
posted at 23:46:58 on June 11, 2011 by dstanley
My Daily's    
"All of the above.
I cannot let a day go by without reading from the Book of Mormon. At least on chapter.
Then I go on to the next book. Right now I am reading Clean Hands Pure Heart by Phillip A. Harrison.
If you have a neglected hobby or are into personal fitness, start working out BUT STAY AWAY FROM THE GYM. For me they were nothing more then "meat markets."
Ask the Bishop, even if you are disfellowshipped what you can do to serve. I have heard of some Bishops absolutely forbidding a disfellowshiped or excommunicated person helping in anyway what so ever. This is a mistake. Ask your Bishop is you can help. If he says no, then go out into your neighborhood and help someone. Maybe a food kitchen or a shelter."
posted at 11:49:29 on June 12, 2011 by 3R's
Great advice from all....    
"I found a podcast early in recovery that helped. Porntopurity. They also have a website. Jeff and Marsha are just a couple of normal christians who talk openly about jeffs addiction and how it has impacted their life and marriage. He Restoreth my Soul is awesome. Don and Jana Hilton do great work. Anything by Carnes. Live in the open with your spouse....no more secrets. I hung a saying on my bathroom mirror....fidelity is all or nothing...heart, mind and eyes. Also helped to hang pictures of wife and kids everywhere i could. Found a good accountability software called Saavi. Works for me and my kids. Also use X3Watch on my IPhone."
posted at 22:17:14 on June 12, 2011 by chefdalet


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"Each one who resolves to climb that steep road to recovery must gird up for the fight of a lifetime. But a lifetime is a prize well worth the price. This challenge uniquely involves the will, and the will can prevail. Healing doesn’t come after the first dose of any medicine. So the prescription must be followed firmly, bearing in mind that it often takes as long to recover as it did to become ill. But if made consistently and persistently, correct choices can cure. "

— Russell M. Nelson

General Conference, October 1988