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Talked out...
By sophie
8/31/2006 12:00:00 AM
On Rufus' blog, he mentioned feeling talked out sometimes.

You may have noticed that I will post several posts and then go awhile without posting anything. That's why. I talk about it with Te. I talk about it with my sisters-in-law. I talk about it on my blog. Sometimes I just want to not talk about it, so I take breaks. Thanks for sticking with me even when I don't post regularly. I appreciate everyone's support. It is amazing to me that there are other people in my same situation who have started blogs recently. It's nice to have this extra support group. I feel like you are all good friends that I have known for a long time, instead of strangers on the internet.

I've been worried about Te since school started. He's been so busy and sleep deprived that we haven't had a chance to talk much. We have been reading the scriptures together every day though, and praying together most every day. On the days we miss, I call him and ask him if he said his own prayer, and tell him that I did too.

Last night we were able to talk for a little while and I told him that I didn't know if I could handle him lying to me anymore. Between being hormonal and pregnant, not feeling well, and not getting enough sleep, I just feel like I'm at a breaking point. I told him if he had anything he needed to tell me, to please tell me now, because I can't handle being lied to right now.

He looked at me with a sweet smile, and said that he had nothing to hide from me. A wave of relief rushed through me. I believe him. He's been busy, and stressed, but he really wants to overcome his addiction. I want to get to a point where I don't doubt him so much. I guess it will just take time. And constant repeating of "trust in the lord..." I say that a lot to myself.

He is such a good man. We just had our 7th anniversary, and I am so glad to have my life with him. He is my best friend. He puts up with an amazing amount from me, for which I am grateful. :)

I love you Te.

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"If it were possible to make your road very easy, you wouldn’t grow in strength. If you were always forgiven for every mistake without effort on your part, you would never receive the blessings of repentance. If everything were done for you, you wouldn’t learn how to work, or gain self-confidence, or acquire the power to change. "

— Richard G. Scott

General Conference May 1990