By faith21
4/30/2011 4:27:17 PM
So my 10th wedding anniversary is coming up. My husband wants to go and get away and take a vacation. I am so stressed because I dont even know why he would want to do that. He doesn't spend time with me when I am home. He doesnt with the kids. We rarely talk (and not because I don't try thats for sure) And the worst part is- I feel like going to a bed and breakfast type thing- is just a time that he can watch TV, and have all the s~x he wants.

So do I plan something? Having him home for 6 days without work would pretty much be a hellish experience....


only you can decide what to do.. it makes me reflect on my past behavior.    
"I felt really bad reading your post. I felt bad because I started to wonder if my wife was anxious about our "vacations" and "get aways" back before I was in recovery. I know that when I was full on in my addiction, i would be only be thinking about sx as well.

Only you know what to do.. Perhaps you schedule the vacation and all of the activities so there is less time. Perhaps you set expectations ahead of time-- quantity of sx, amount of required foreplay, etc.. i know checklists arent very sexy but they are really good for men's brains.

good luck"
posted at 19:20:25 on April 30, 2011 by Hurtallover
I agree    
"Only you can make that decision. I suggest some time praying about it. Whatever you do, I agree that making sure the two of you are on the same page is a good idea."
posted at 00:58:04 on May 1, 2011 by dstanley

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"Now, my brothers and sisters, let not Jesus’ redemption for us stop at the immortalizing dimension of the Atonement, “the loosing of the bands of death”. Let us grasp the proffered gift of eternal life! We will end up either choosing Christ’s manner of living or His manner of suffering! It is either “suffer even as I”, or overcome “even as [He] … overcame”. His beckoning command is to become “even as I am”. The spiritually settled accept that invitation, and “through the atonement of Christ,” they become and overcome! "

— Neal A. Maxwell

General Conference May 1987