By hero
4/1/2011 6:56:02 PM
Recently a couple in our recovery group attended D. Weiss 3 day couples intensives. They have communicated that the experience has changed their lives and their recovery. Here is some information that is shared on his weekly newsletter. It may be helpful.

I hope you all are working on recovery and making progress. I am doing the same. And trying to have much patience.

Practical Exercises and Step Talk
Excerpts From: 101 Practical Exercises for Sexual Addiction Recovery by Weiss

As a sex addict, your brain has been conditioned neurologically to your acting out behaviors. Many sex addicts were exposed to pornography at a young age and began to masturbate and/or fantasize with it. Every time the addict ejaculated, he sent a rush of chemicals to his brain called endorphins and enkephalins. The brain as an organ of the body, has no morality. It just knows that when it gets a rush of what I call "brain cookies," (or chemicals) it feels good. The rush could be from heroine, sky diving, sex or cocaine, but what ever has caused the rush, the brain as an organ would not have a moral dilemma on how it got this rush.

After frequent ejaculations brought on by acting out, the sexual addict begins to develop neurological pathways in the brain while acting out sexually. The brain as an organ, adjusts to getting it's neurological need met by the cycle of going into a fantasy state and 20 to 30 minutes later sending the brain a rush of "brain cookies" through ejaculation.

To recover from sexual addiction, you must retrain your brain to not connect the fantasy world with these so called "brain cookies." To stop this biological cycle that the sex addict had set up sometimes for as long as 10 years up to 50 years ago, we need a biological reconditioning cycle. Place a rubber band on either wrist and when you start to objectify, fantasize, or have sexually inappropriate thoughts snap the rubber band on the inside of your wrist. This sets up a cycle in your brain that says "fantasy = pain" instead of "fantasy = pleasure." The body is designed to avoid pain, and so this will reduce the amount of fantasies that you are having and eventually lessen the sexual thoughts so that you can focus on your recovery.

The average person who is very consistent with this reconditioning exercise of the brain finds that about 80% of the fantasy life-style subsides within the first thirty days and if continued throughout the first 90 days, they find intruding thoughts are minimal and manageable with other exercises from the 101 Exercise Book.


Thanks for Sharing    
"Good to hear from you again too. I hope things are going well for you."
posted at 23:26:43 on April 1, 2011 by dstanley
Hero- Thanks    
"Working recovery is hard work and there are no instant Christians, but Dr. Weiss has some really great stuff which has helped me and my husband so much.

Learning what we have and living the lds 12 step program has helped us more than I can say. Keep sharing everywhere, because you are making a difference.

This Porn is nasty stuff and we must learn to live a new life as we walk the pathway to Christ. Complete surrender of our agency to the Savior is the only way. People like Dr. Weiss and programs like the 12 steps are major stepping stones to avoiding those stumbling blocks Satan has so easily placed before us.

Thanks so much for all you do, you are an Angel in the lives of those reading this blog."
posted at 00:52:23 on April 2, 2011 by Anonymous
Wrong Stimuli to the Brain    
"I struggled with Same Sex Attraction in my twenties and I saw a therapist. He said if you mb to a dirty shoe (sounds foolish but bear with me) for thirty days that your brain would be aroused to shoes. I doubt he actually conducted that experiment but I think I got his point. You can train your brain to respond to anything when giving it the right stimuli. Same with prn."
posted at 01:46:27 on April 2, 2011 by Anonymous
Thanks Sister D ! and Anon 1    
"It seems many of the posters who would frequent here occasionally I have not seen post for awhile? Just wondering about Crushed, Katie, Hubster, Enough, Speak, Rugga, Angel, Summer, Beclean?? Hope you are all well and healing!!"
posted at 23:48:46 on April 3, 2011 by hero
Weiss was a God sent blessing to me    
"Without doubt the ARP program is second to none, it is the foundation for my recovery (Helaman 5:12) and weiss served as a window to a whole other world I have avoided for all my life, emotional happiness with loved ones. I am still discovering this new world which appears vast and expansive but I like what I see.

Hero I am very well, clean as can be and staying that way. The Lord has done some miraculous healing in my life, the misses still struggles but she has healed a lot too. I still pray for her every night and I am sure the Lord is like "Oh man here he goes again..." but I know somehow this praying has softened my heart and helped me be a better man in the home.

I just decided like you to take a break and not rely too much on this site fro my recovery, to have a balance in my habits. It has been good but yes I read here weekly still and I still enjoy this community.

Prayers to you too. I will respond to your IA comments."
posted at 08:50:04 on April 4, 2011 by ruggaexpat

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"Strength comes from uplifting music, good books, and feasting from the scriptures. Since the Book of Mormon was to come forth “when there shall be great pollutions upon the face of the earth” (Morm. 8:31), study of that book in particular will fortify us."

— Russell M. Nelson

General Conference, October 1988